"Forks" {Pendragon} (MF cons wl)
FORKS By Uther Pendragon anon584c@nyx.net
IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 18, or otherwise forbidden by law to read electronically transmitted erotic material, please go do something else.
This material is Copyright, 1997, Uther Pendragon. All rights reserved. I specifically grant the right of downloading and keeping ONE electronic copy for your personal reading so long as this notice is included. Reposting requires previous permission.
All persons here depicted, except public figures depicted as public figures in the background, are figments of my imagination and any resemblance to persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.
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FORKS By Uther Pendragon anon584c@nyx.net "Sniffles," Jeanette Brennan thought, "are an under-rated physical handicap." At work, she dealt with stinky carbonless copies. Every wipe of her nose brought those chemicals close to her nose and eyes. Now she was trying to cook and needed to wash her hands every time she blew her nose. Bob had spent his worst three days lying face down on the bed, and then she had caught it from him.
Her cold had never been as acute as his, but she could have used a few days in bed nevertheless. She hadn't been working long enough for sick days, however; and having a cold isn't really being sick.
Normally, she could have prepared the tomato soup and the sandwiches at the same time. As it was, she opened the cans and dumped them in the pan, turned on the fire, blew her nose, washed her hands, scraped out the cans, added the milk powder, turned off the fire, blew her nose, washed her hands, mixed the milk in the cans, stirred the first milk into the soup, blew her nose, washed her hands, and finally guessed that it was safe to turn the gas back on.
The night before, she had made enough rice for that night's fried rice and tonight's tomato-rice soup. When she looked in the refrigerator, however, she found half of it gone. Bob was entitled to snacks, she hadn't labeled the rice, it wasn't as if he had gone hog-wild on an expensive delicacy, but still.... She dumped what was left of it into the pan.
She heard Bob call "Love you," at that moment. Then the door slammed. She hadn't heard it open. Instead of coming and hugging her, he made a rush to the bedroom. Then she heard him blow his nose loudly. She finally got her hug after he had washed his hands at the sink. She didn't want him dripping on her hair, she didn't want germ-filled hands clasping her -- especially while she was cooking, but still she did need a hug. She needed him to ask how her day was. Before he did, she had to break the hug to blow her own nose. When she came back, she had to stir the soup.
"Rain is much the worst weather for colds," said Bob. "Freezing temps aren't half as bad. I can remember snowy days when I was a kid. Much better than this rain. By the way, what time is supper?"
"Look," she answered, "I didn't know when you'd be coming home, you know. This damn cold has me spending more time blowing my nose than cooking. When you were down with it, you didn't wash one dish. If you want to eat sooner, you can set the table."
"I'm glad you're happy. How long to supper?"
"I don't have one reason in the whole wide world to be happy. Why should I be? If you had spent one tenth the time this summer learning to cook a few cheap dishes that you spent fiddling with those charts, you could cook your own dinner. I do most of the cleaning; why should I do all the cooking?"
"I know that you work hard. What I don't know is when dinner will be."
"Ten minutes. Fifteen minutes. I don't know with all this dripping and hand-washing."
"Thanks for the information. Hardly pays to turn on the computer for that length of time. I have to write a paper due tomorrow, and I had to finish the research tonight. That's why I was late. Soup and... ?"
"Toasted cheese sandwiches. You say that you like them."
"I do, normally. They'll taste like cardboard tonight, but everything does. I should be able to taste the soup, though." Bob set the table with plates for the sandwiches, bowls for the soup, glasses, napkins and soup spoons.
Jeanette finished the cooking, dished up, and sat through grace. Then she got up and ostentatiously placed a knife and fork at her place setting.
"Why," asked Bob, "do you need a knife and fork for soup and sandwiches?"
Jeanette cut a piece out of her sandwich and brought it to her mouth with the fork. "A place setting," she answered after she had swallowed, "includes a knife, fork, and spoon. Always! Even if you are not going to use any of them. You can stand up and eat out of the serving bowls on your midnight depredations of my planned meals; but, when this has a meal, we are going to have a set table. You cut every corner. Do I have to tell you how to set a table every time?"
"No you don't! I know how to set a table. You just have different rules. I wash the damn dishes, and I don't want to wash unused articles. Is that so strange? Who, besides your mother, is watching to see how we set the table?"
"I'm watching. I want a dinner, not a dorm snack. I want a house that looks and feels and smells like a home, not smelling of three-week laundry."
"That's unfair. The laundry is because I was lying in there with my nose running like a faucet. Now I'm behind in my school work, and I have to catch up *tonight*. The laundry will be done tomorrow. Anyway...."
"No, Bob. That's not true. The laundry is *two* weeks because you treat a cold like a case of diphtheria. It is *three* weeks because you didn't do it two weeks ago. If you planned to do the laundry every week, we would have enough to take you over colds."
"Jeanette, I am not your damned assistant. I do the laundry. Period. I don't tell you how to cook, and...."
"You came in tonight criticizing the delay. When you have a cold the world stops. When I have one, I can't run late by one minute."
"I *never* complained about dinner being late! I asked when it would be. You decided not to answer my question, but that was my question. I had to ask it three times."
"You were implying...."
"You were guessing. I *told* you what I wanted to know. I have a paper to write, and this sure as hell isn't helping. You run the cuisine. I tell you what I like, but I don't supervise the menu."
"You sabotage it, though! You ate the rice for the soup."
"I'm sorry. I didn't see the warning. You ought to stick them on with tape."
"Well, I didn't think that I needed a warning. It was only one night, and it was rice."
"Which is the cheapest food in the house. If I'd eaten bread, there wouldn't be enough for sandwiches. Anyway, it wasn't labeled. That makes it fair game. I don't tell you what to cook, I don't tell you when to cook, I don't tell you how to cook. We tell people, 'Bob participates in the housework.' Well Bob is damn-well going to participate; he isn't going to follow Jeanette's directions."
"It's not my directions. It's common sense. You said that you would do the dishes and the laundry. That doesn't mean once a year for each of them. That means doing them when they should be done. You could have added vacuuming to your list; you think that vacuuming *never* needs to be done."
"World survived before Mr. Hoover. That's not the point. Every dirty dish gets washed; every dirty piece of clothing. By me. On my schedule. By my method, with my choice of soap and bleach and laundromat. You just can't distinguish between a partner and a servant.
"Speaking of which, your servant, Madame, departs to write his paper." Bob left his dishes on the table. When she heard the computer make its boot-up bleeps, she picked up the sandwich and finished it. It did taste like cardboard.
She was sorely tempted to vacuum the living room now. Realistically, however, that would put as much strain on the computer as on Bob; and they couldn't afford a new computer. For that matter, she didn't want Bob to get a bad grade. The hell of marriage is that it entwines two people's futures so thoroughly that you can't really take adequate without messing up your own life. Anyway, she'd vacuumed on Sunday. What she really wanted to do was to crawl into a murder mystery and not come out until the world decided to meet her terms.
Lacking a murder mystery, she might as well do the mending. She had a parted seam in one blouse and two buttons to sew on her clothes. She saw no reason on God's green earth to sew buttons on Bob's shirts; let him do it himself as he had done in his summers away, and let him make a mess of it as he had done then. She went to fetch the sewing box from the bedroom.
Before she reached it, she spotted a book on the bed. It was a Rex Stout from the university library. Mending forgotten, she undressed and slipped under the covers in her robe. She was nearing the midpoint of the book when Bob came in. Archie was going to the ballpark when Bob sat on the bed. He slipped under the covers and cuddled her. "Tell me when you get to a stopping point," he said.
"Probably as good a place as any," she admitted. "Oh, Bob, I do love you most of the time."
"Well, I *love* you all of the time. I can *stand* you most of the time."
She giggled. "Well I wouldn't go that far about standing you," she said. "Save me a space." He was on the side of the bed when she got back but moved over for her. She doused the light, doffed her robe, and slid into the space he'd abandoned. "Warm," she said. He was thoughtful that way. He hugged her as she backed against him. He nuzzled and kissed her neck. "Mouth?" she asked.
"I'm still too drippy."
"I already have the cold."
"But still...." he said.
She settled down to receive his kisses for a while. His hand went to her breast. She pushed her hips back, less to increase contact than to communicate approval. He shifted so his thigh was pressed into the crease between hers. While her body relaxed in his warm -- familiar -- embrace, her nipples stiffened to his toying fingers. She turned on her back when the quiet petting felt insufficient.
Bob was quick to accept the implicit invitation. "Love you," he said as he ducked under the cover to kiss her shoulder. From there he kissed a trail to her right breast. He was still too stuffed up to breathe through his nose, leaving the kisses feeling different. They weren't less sexy or more sexy, just different.
His hand cupped her left until his mouth had reached her nipple, then tickled down her stomach toward where it was needed. She became increasingly impatient as he played with the hair on her delta. Finally, however, he reached her labia. In no mood for teasing him this night, she already had her legs parted wide. She pressed up when he first clasped her whole mound, then widened her legs when he slipped a finger between her labia. He switched while his fingers teased the entire sensitive area. She was tensing in anticipation when he withdrew to simply clasp her again.
"You okay?" he asked perfunctorily.
"Yes. Want me on my side?"
"Please." Practiced, they reached the position in moments. He used his hand to place himself at her entrance, then slid inside gently and slowly. She allowed time for his left hand to snake under her and clasp her and his right hand to return to her mons. Her arch backward to improve the impalement signaled the beginning of motion on both their parts. The friction, the fullness, the pressure of his groin on the back of her labia, and the play of his fingers on the front of them soon regained the arousal that the change of position had lost.
She went past that point, spasmed and soared, heard Bob's "Oh darling!" in response. The pace of his thrusts into her clutching tunnel quickened. Then his hand abandoned her mons for her hip. He drove into her and pulled her back onto him. He throbbed within her and grunted somewhere behind her.
Then they were both finished. They lay joined together below the waist, but with their torsos at an angle. Bob petted her right arm slowly. She used the first Kleenex he passed her for her nose, and asked for another for the mess. He finally moved back and she snuggled against him. She fell asleep with him cupping her breast, and she didn't even wonder what Nero Wolfe would do next. The End FORKS Uther Pendragon anon584c@nyx.net 1997/04/24 2001/10/28 This is one of a series of about the Brennans.
The next in the series is: forthrig.txt "Forthright"
The first in the series is: forever.txt "Forever"
The directory to the entire series is: brennan.txt Brennan Directory
A non-Brennan in which a couple's quarrel figures prominently is: mcmurdo.txt "McMurdo Sound"
The directory to all my can be found at: index.txt Index to Uther Pendragon's FTP site
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