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ISSUE 13 old first person and present

 

Tainted Lime Reviews Issue #13
February 4, 2002

I've had several people ask about how I choose the stories I review.
Basically, I look at the subject lines and try to guess which stories
I might like.

I prefer consensual stories, and I dislike humiliation and pedophilia.
Science fiction, celebrities, mind control, incest, fan fiction ...
there are many genres that I think are boring or ridiculous. While
no-sex stories may be an interesting change of pace, I have a strong
preference for sexual content.

On occasion, I'll read a story outside my confort zone, but if the
plot and characters aren't compelling, I'm not likely to enjoy it.

Reviews are archived at http://www.asstr.org/~TaintedLime/.

---

Stories reviewed in this issue:

Sex For Sale, by Idle Hands (* * *)
Between The Fucking Lines, by D.B. Metallo (* *)
Taken, by Robert B. Morton, II (* * * *)
Who's Sorry Now?, by theGreatxIam (* * * *)
The Chair, by Green man (* * * *)
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{ASSM} Sex For Sale (Exhib, MF)
By Idle Hands <oneidlehand@hotmail.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35015

If you read ASSM, you know that a good way to earn a little extra
cash is to sell sex toys to women at private parties in people's
homes. What you don't usually see in ASSM, though, is how much
*more* you can make if you sell those toys to men.

While the story does a good job explaining how the narrator
became a toy saleswoman, it falls short setting up this
particular party, and that is a serious problem. The motivations
of the narrator are severely underplayed several times at key
moments of the story. When she decides to do a party for men.
When she decides she will demonstrate the products for the men.
When she first takes off her clothes.

Another big problem is the narrator shifts back and forth from
telling the story in a traditional past tense to a stream-of-
consciousness-like present tense. While this results in a talky,
informal feel to the writing, it also causes the amount of detail
to vary widely from paragraph to paragraph. The story is very
choppy.

But what a great idea for a story! Imagine the tension building
as the saleswoman models sexy lingerie for a group of men.
Imagine what happens when she breaks out the toys. The potential
is definitely here for a sexy and unique story.
Rating: * * *

---

{ASSM} (ASS, ASSM) Between The Fucking Lines (humor)
By D.B. Metallo <db_metallo@hotmail.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35019

Well, the author isn't attempting anything erotic here, or so he
says at the outset. He's making fun of those "trite cliches" that
abound in ASSM. (As opposed to those untrite cliches, I suppose.)

Really, this is one decent joke repeated over and over again
until it overstays its welcome. And yes, the author is correct -
it's not very erotic.

Maybe you'll enjoy this if you're tired of reading sex stories and want to see what *really* happens when the guy gets together
with the girl. But if you're like me, you'll want to find a story where the girl doesn't have a booger hanging from her nose.
Rating: * *

---

{ASSM} NEW SHORT STORY! Taken (M/M)
By Robert B. Morton, II <khaan@speakeasy.org>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35020

This is a story about a man who is with Jarrod, his male lover. I
suppose calling Jarrod a lover is stretching things a bit,
because this is definitely a love-hate relationship. The narrator
oscillates between sexual arousal and self-loathing.

Told in first person and present tense, the story suffers because
as much time is spent on internal thoughts as external actions.
While some effort is spent explaining what it's like to have a
cock shoved down your throat, it's followed by a long speech
about what it *means* to have a cock shoved down your throat. This
is a problem with almost every stream-of-consciousness story I've
ever read.

But this is still a fascinating story. With all the internal
dialogue, we get a good, clear picture of what is going through
the narrator's head. And this narrator has a lot of complicated,
contradictory thoughts. The sex is rough and unpleasant, and this
story has a convincing picture of what goes through a man's head
when he's the recipient of less-than-loving treatment.
Rating: * * * *

---

{ASSM} Subway series#4: Who's Sorry Now?
By theGreatxIam <max_wojtylak@yahoo.com>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35029

It makes a lot of sense for a series of stories that take place
on subways would eventually make it to the crowded trains in
Japan. And here we have it from theGreatxIam.

However, this story contains a lot of backstory telling us how a
degradable polymer was developed. Not a hint of sex, not a hint
of subways, not a hint of Japan.

Japan shows up when someone in a big Japanese company figures out
the polymer can be used to make CDs self-destruct in ten years.
But still no subways and still no sex.

Finally, after a disastrous meeting with the honchos at Ekasa,
the narrator gets on one of the Tokyo subways. And finally, he
gets pushed up against a horny young woman.

The sex, when it finally arrives, is very exciting. The chemistry
and the business meetings weren't quite as exciting, but they
were interesting enough. On the whole, though, the story feels
front-heavy. The buildup meanders too much.

Don't get me wrong - this is an excellent story about a man who
is a little bitter about his experience in Japan. Although I
thought he should be a little more appreciative - his trip ended
with quite a bang!
Rating: * * * *

---

{ASSM} "The Chair" (MF, light bd, cons, f-ejac)
By Green man <greenman@nym.alias.net>
http://assm.asstr.org/Year2002/35033

A man who works as a high school teacher has a wife who is a high-
powered lawyer. His wife is a real driver, a take charge kind of
woman. Some husbands might feel emasculated by that. But not this
guy. You see, this guy has a chair.

When the wife comes home from work, her husband has donned a ski
mask and pretends to rob the house. They use a safe word, so
everything is completely consensual. The pseudo-intruder slaps
and pushes and forces the wife to take off her clothes, and then
he ties her to The Chair.

The characters in this story do too much "striping" when they would
have more fun taking off their clothes, and there were a few
other minor typos. But the writing is generally very good.

This story is rougher than I thought it would be from the "light
bd" story code. And while I don't generally enjoy stories that
try to humiliate one of the characters, in this particular case,
the game worked, thanks to the way the characters were
introduced. This is one of the better bondage stories I've read.
Rating: * * * *

 

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