Illegal Vietnamese ladyboy; m/F t/F, t/M, etc. More Bigby at; http://www.asstr.org/~Bigby/ and; ftp://ftp.asstr.org/pub/Authors/Bigby/ [in plain text]
I sure do appreciate getting some mail back; bigbystories@hotmail.com
It's hard to get a job as an immigrant in Britain. Even harder when you have no identity papers.
I was just 16 years when I arrived from Vietnam. My had spent all they had to have me smuggled here. The journey was long and hard, and I arrived at my cousin's apartment with little more than the clothes on my back.
My cousin was the pride of the family; she had earned a scholarship to a British university, and then went on to marry one of her fellow students and become a legal resident.
I hadn't seen her for at least four years, since she was seventeen years old. I was quite shocked at the changes I saw in her. She answered the door with her hair down [it reached her hips], and she had makeup on and a lot of cheap jewelry. She wore a short skirt and high heels; my heart skipped a beat as I realized that this was the woman I had come to stay with.
Sue was a legal resident, and had a decent job. But for an illegal, there were only a couple of things to do aside from prostitution and drug dealing; cleaning and construction work.
I was much too frail looking to get hired on those construction sites. There were all these big East Bloc guys, and some of them even had experience.
I'm very thin and small compared with European people. I tried to find a cleaning job.
There were a few hotels that were known to hire "black" labor. But I was having a hard time getting in.
My cousin used to work as a cleaner in a hotel during her university days, but that hotel only hired women.
It made me quite angry; there was supposed to be no discrimination here in Europe.
I was desperate, I needed work. I wasn't here to sponge from my cousin, I was here to earn money to make a life for myself, and hopefully send some home as well.
"I know how to get you that job." My cousin Sue said. "We'll put you in one of my dresses, and put some ear rings on you."
I thought she was joking at first.
She helped me dress, painted my face for me, and leant me some cheap jewelry.
I smiled at the manager as he looked me up and down. He hired me.
That's how I began dressing as a girl. Clothes are expensive, and my wages were low; I couldn't afford two wardrobes, so I mostly had woman's clothes in my closet.
Also, Sue was worried that if it was known a was living with her, she could have trouble with her divorce. I couldn't afford any kind of trouble since I had no papers at all, and she convinced me that I'd have less trouble as a girl.
I soon got used to it, and I even used to go out to the shops like that, especially if I was looking for more clothes or some costume jewelry, shoes, or accessories.
People were much more friendly to me when I was a woman. Somehow people were threatened by a foreign male, but a foreign female was okay with them. And the prettier I made myself, the more friendly they were.
Even the women would smile at me on the street. The were often a bit rude, but they were mostly fine. Sometimes on the bus, they would grab my ass or touch my legs. I got a laugh out of that, wondering what they would think of themselves if they knew they were getting a thrill by feeling up a guy in drag.
Of course, I couldn't have a girlfriend; but it was unlikely that I would find one anyway, being rather unattractive as a male as well as quite destitute.
As a woman, I was very attractive; of course I couldn't have a boyfriend since a few well-placed grabs at my body would reveal the truth about me. But it was nice to be attractive, to be smiled at and flirted with, to be treated well. I let my hair grow long and learned how to make my face pretty. I invested in a pair of small but well formed strap on breasts. My life was twisted, but not bad.
It was a little difficult, living with my cousin; she had several boyfriends, and I had to keep out of her way when she brought one home.
Sometimes, she'd invite one for dinner, and I'd do the cooking and serve them. The English like their food very bland, completely tasteless.
I would always dress carefully and make sure my makeup was perfect if Sue was bringing a to the apartment. I don't know why, but I found it's important to be attractive.
I used to watch her with them. I was very lonely, my situation being what it was. I had almost no hope of finding someone to love me anytime soon. Watching my cousin was all I had.
Her bedroom didn't have a proper door, just strings of beads hanging across the doorway. When I turned off the lights in the main room, I couldn't be seen as I lurked outside.
I was amazed at the things she did with them. Especially when she their huge white European cocks. Her black hair across their pale bodies as her head would rise up and down on their shafts drove me crazy.
They would kiss her and hold her tight, they would lick her in return, and she would twist and cry softly with pleasure, holding their pale faces in her hands, her long bright nails digging into their heads as she climaxed.
She loved to be penetrated. I liked to watch her face as a would enter her. She always looked so excited and happy.
I always had mixed feelings about their large powerful bodies dominating my lovely cousin, their arms around her slim body, their barbarian penises inside her slim Vietnamese groin.
It excited me to watch, excited me terribly. But at the same time I felt sorrow and shame. Sorrow for my cousin who couldn't seem to find a that would stay with her and care for her. Shame for my family, knowing how they would be if they knew of her promiscuity.
She often wouldn't want to see a fellow again after she had let him in her bed.
"Tell him I'm not here." She'd say when I had one on the phone asking for her.
"Why don't you like him?" I asked her once afterwards. "He seems like a nice man, he took you out many times, and you say you enjoyed his company."
"Didn't you see how pale and rough his skin was?" She asked me. "And he is so loud and rude."
"Didn't he please you last night?" I asked. I felt more like a woman than a by then, so it was okay to ask such into the questions; we were talking to girl, sort of.
"I enjoyed myself at the time, but now I find I don't want to see him again." She told me. "It's just how I feel."
Often, when Sue would finely tell them she didn't want to see them anymore, they would ask me out on a date. Of course I always said no, but sometimes I thought it would be fun to go out and see a or get treated to a nice meal. Some of them were really nice.
Sue and I became very close; we told each other our secrets, brushed each other's hair, and would file and paint each other's fingernails. She showed me how to make myself look right, how to walk in high-heeled shoes, and how to dress.
One night, as we sat in front of the television together, we started to snuggle together; I put my arm around her, and she put her hand on my thigh. I had stopped thinking about having sex with her; I was a to her, not a man. But spontaneously, we began to make love. We kissed for a long time, exploring each other, contemplating the possibilities.
What would become of our relationship? I knew it could be dangerous. I had watched her dispose of so many lovers. But I had to have her; I was a virgin, I had never even kissed a before. I was overwhelmed with carnal desire, it overwhelmed my better judgment.
Many times I had watched lick her vagina; I had an idea what she liked. I did my best, licking her first slowly, then quickly.
She my cock, like she did for all her boyfriends. I felt so privileged as I watched her beautiful face against me, on my small inadequate penis as though it was as good as any she had experienced.
I exploded in her mouth, unable in my inexperience to prevent myself.
We relaxed and kissed for some time, and I became hard again.
We were both completely naked as I entered her; her flesh against mine was a sensation unlike any I'd ever even imagined. The soft warm smoothness of her, her true femininity eclipsing my artificial girlhood.
Her face was as joyous and excited as I had ever seen her; she climaxed two times before we were through.
"I don't know if it was a wise thing that we did last night." Sue said to me over breakfast.
"I'm sorry, cousin." I told her. "I didn't mean to take advantage of you."
She laughed, and said; "Don't be sorry, you did nothing wrong. I am the experienced one here, I made the decision. Was it good for you?"
"It was the greatest night of my life." I answered her truthfully.
"Then you would want to do it again?" She asked.
"If you do." I told her.
She thought about it as she ate the food I had served her.
"I will have other lovers." She informed me.
"I understand, Sue." I said, feeling great pain yet great joy; of course I couldn't compare with the she knew, but she would allow me to make love with her sometimes; she had agreed that we could be lovers.
"You are very sweet, little cousin." She told me with a smile that warmed my heart, "And I do love you dearly. But you know how I sometimes need a real man."
"Yes, I know." I answered her.
When I saved up enough money, I managed to buy some forged identification documents. With documents, I could get a legal job, and a bank account. My new identity was female; that's how I spent most of my time, and how I worked. As a woman.
But then I started to get worried about how dangerous it was; how simple it would be for someone to find me out. I investigated the possibility of implants. It could be done, but was very expensive. I found out that I could order hormones over the Internet that would probably work for me, since I was not yet even 17 years old.
I was amazed at how quickly it all happened; my new feminine appendages began budding within four months.
And along with my breasts, new feelings began to form in my chest. I began to find more and more attractive. I repressed these feelings, but I longed to be held and cherished. I wanted to feel strong arms around me, I wanted to taste a man's mouth.
My cousin seemed to enjoy my little breasts. My nipples puffed up like hers, and she liked to suck on them and play with them while we had sex.
I had read that many can no longer become erect when they take those hormones, but somehow I could. Perhaps it was my youth.
Usually, I cleaned unoccupied rooms, but sometimes the guests were there. I always felt very self-conscious to be in someone's room with them. The uniform we had to wear wasn't at all revealing, but did leave some leg showing, and showed my slim figure. Most of the people who stayed were single men, traveling on business. They all looked at me in that way that look at desirable women. There were mirrors everywhere, I could keep an eye on them even when they thought I wasn't looking. It frightened me and excited me.
One day, an American propositioned me.
"What's your name, sweetheart?" He asked first.
"Joon Lee." I answered him.
"Where are you from, Joon?" He asked me.
"Vietnam." I answered.
"Really? I was there when I was young." He told me. I hadn't realized he was that old.
"I think Vietnamese are the most beautiful in the world." He added. It took me a moment to realize he was talking about me. I busied myself with the bed sheets.
"How much do you earn, working here?"
"Very little." I answered him.
"Would you like to earn extra 50 pounds?" He asked quietly.
I turned and stared at him in shock; he actually wanted to pay me money to have sex with him. The idea appalled me; how demeaning, how terrible.
But 50 pounds; that was a lot of money. I could buy that dress I'd seen the day before.
He wasn't an unattractive man; in fact, I had been excited just being alone in the room with him.
He stood up and slowly walked to the door; very gently, he closed it.
"No, I can't do something like that." I told him; I meant it literally.
Slowly, deliberately, he unbuckled his trousers. "Of course you can, Joon Lee." He said, "It's easy, there's nothing wrong with it. There's no shame in giving a pleasure; there's no shame at all."
He opened his trousers, and fished out his big white penis. It was at least his big as any that I'd seen. It was beautiful, and my mouth watered with desire. But I was no whore! I couldn't do it for money. and yet, I felt flattered this would pay. I could give him a blow job, that was possible; it was more than possible, it was my dream.
He sat down in the chair, and spread his legs.
"Come on now, Joon Lee." He said, pointing at his stiff penis with one hand while he stroked it with the other, his eyes never leaving mine.
"I bet you've done this before. Come on now, kneel down here."
Without thinking, without consciously knowing what I was doing, I approached him. I kneeled down on the carpet between his legs; I reached out and touched his hot white penis, I closed my hand around it. It bulged with power, and a shiver went through my body. My heart was pounding in my ears, my little dick was straining in my panties. I looked up at his face; he seemed so strong, so manly; he had been with many girls, real girls. He wanted me, he wanted me to suck his dick now. He found me attractive, he thought I was sexy; I could see the anticipation and desire in his expression and he waited for my mouth to cover his sex.
There was no going back anyway, I had to do it. I had to overcome my fear and suck this cock I held in my hands, his big beautiful potent penis. I could never have such an organ for myself, this was as close as I would ever be to having such a one; to worship the penis of another, the penis of a real man.
I could never be a real woman either, but I could pretend. If I pleasured this man, and he thought I was a woman, then that was as close as it would be possible to be.
The feeling of his penis against my lips was heavenly; its hot power in my mouth was devilish. I had never done it, but I knew how it was done. My sweet cousin had given me many blow jobs, and I knew how to pleasure this man. He strong fingers ran through my black hair as I stroked his big hairy balls and sucked his penis deep into my mouth, as I looked up into his eyes and smiled around his cock.
I didn't want it to end; it was so wonderful, I wanted it to last forever. But after some time, he had to come; and I wanted him to come, I wanted that final fulfillment of knowing I'd truly satisfied a man. I wanted his hot sperm, and I got it.
He held my head between his hands and groaned, pumping his big manly penis in out of my sissy lips. Once more, I looked up at his face. He looked down at me with a strange expression as his dick erupted at last.
I didn't know if I would be able to handle it; of course I was afraid. But it was no problem. My mouth filled with the unfamiliar fluid, and I swallowed it all. I was so proud of myself.
"You Vietnamese whores give the best head." He said, slumping back in the chair. "I've always said so." He added.
I finished making the bed and cleaning the toilet.
As I turned to leave, he handed me five 20 pound notes.
"I'll be seeing you soon." He told me.
About a month later, the was staying in the hotel again, with another American man.
My knees were trembling in fear and excitement as I entered the room; how I longed to feel his penis in my mouth again, to taste his sperm. And yet I was terribly afraid.
Afraid of these forbidden feelings, the doubly forbidden action; doing it with a man, and accepting money. I could refuse the money; but if you've ever been as poor as I was, you'd know how difficult that is.
"Joon Lee, this is my friend Steve. This is the I was telling you about Steve, the hottest little maid in London. She can vacuum the floor with one hand, and vacuum your dick at the same time!"
The laughed, as I blushed with embarrassment.
"Hey, Joon Lee;" the called Steve said to me as I tried to get on with my work, "Sam and I would like to take you out tonight. Don't you have a friend or something to make it a foursome?"
The idea of the date, of being taken to dinner by a was about the only thing more exciting to me in the possibility of pleasuring his penis. A date! To be treated like a human being at last.
"I could ask my cousin." I said.
"Is she cute?" Steve asked.
"Very cute." I said proudly.
My cousin was doubtful; "Americans? American soldiers?"
"They're not soldiers anymore, that was 30 years ago."
"How are these men?"
"They don't look very old."
"How are they? Tell me."
"Well, they're both very fit. But I suppose 50 or 60 years old."
"Are you mad? Sixty years old! Forget it. "
"Please cousin, please! I've never been on a date before. I so want to go, and they're such generous men."
She looked at me suspiciously; "What do you mean, 'generous'?"
I told her at last; how I'd given the a blow job, and he paid me not 50, but 100 pounds. I left out his remark about "whores", though.
"I'm not a prostitute!" My cousin shouted. I was surprised at how upset she was.
"But your boyfriends are always buying you gifts. What's the difference?" I said, "They only want to take us to dinner. No one said anything about anything else. Please, please, cousin!"
I made her favorite dinner, massaged her feet, and prepared her bath.
"Oh, all right." She said at last. "They can buy us dinner, but that's all."
I was delirious with happiness.
We spent more than an hour dressing; it was wonderful and sexy by itself. My cousin helped me choose my outfit, and lent me a pair of her earrings. I brushed her hair for her.
Sam and Steve arrived at our little apartment with a box of chocolates and a bouquet of flowers; the large pale seemed to fill the small space; they made me feel small and powerless, feminine and sexy.
They complimented us both on our appearance; I could see my cousin beaming. The were quite compared to us, but they knew how to make like them.
We went to a beautiful restaurant, a place like I had never been inside of. Steve held the taxi door open while we climbed in; Sam held my chair as I sat down. I knew it was just a fantasy, but it was so wonderful to feel appreciated for the first time in my life.
Of course my cousin was more used to being treated this way; it was normal for her to be taken to dinner, have flowers bought for her, have beg her for her favors. Of course, she had the anatomy required to give them what they wanted in return.
I ate daintily, as my cousin had taught me. Steve put his big strong hand on my thigh under the table.
They told us how they were going to be working in London for a few years, and were looking at rental apartments.
After dinner, the took us to a dance club. Sue danced wonderfully, her balance perfect despite her high heels. Her long hair gleamed in the spotlights. First Sam danced with her, then Steve. I could see she was really enjoying herself.
I was too timid to dance; I sat on my chair and tried to look pretty.
Both my cousin and I were wearing very light little dresses; I was getting a lot of attention. A came up to me at the moment when all of my companions were on the dance floor. He was a bit drunk, and wouldn't accept the fact that I was with someone. He sat down in Steve's chair, and put his hand on my thigh. I told him to stop, but he moved closer; I was afraid, I didn't know what to do.
Suddenly, my big American was there. Sam just smiled at the man, and squeezed his shoulder a bit savagely.
"I think you really want to leave this lady alone." He told the man.
The looked at Sam's calm unworried expression, and left.
Sam laughed, "Guys like that are never to drunk to know what's good for them." He said.
"Let's get out of here."
The four of us walked through the dark city streets, unafraid; it was a wonderful feeling, a feeling of invulnerability, of being under the protection of two powerful men. In my high heels, I barely reached Steve's shoulder; his powerful arm was around my hips. I wanted to kiss him and hold him, I wanted to feel his body against mine. I wanted to eat his cock.
Sam flagged a taxi, and we went home. The came upstairs with us; nothing was said about it, they just came up. I was waiting for Sue to object, but she didn't. I was very excited about it all; I was little worried, but with Sue there I felt more confident.
Steve's powerful embrace lifted me right from the floor; he scooped my ass in his hands, and lifted me like a doll; I wrapped my thighs around his hips, threw my arms around his neck, and kissed him deeply. I couldn't stop myself, I had to do it. I had to cherish the feelings of a woman while I had the chance.
His strong arms held me, his strong hands moved across my back and shoulders as his alien tongue explored mine.
How I longed for a vagina; how I wished to be a real woman!
He carried me to our little couch, and threw me down on it; he kneeled on the floor, looming above me as he fondled my and we kissed.
I was wearing my "special panties". They kept my little penis folded back under a barrier made of hard foam rubber. A casual grab wouldn't be able to detect the deception; but if Steve pulled them down, all could be revealed. I slid off the couch and onto the floor; I went for his belt buckle.
The anticipation was almost as pleasurable as the actual contact; his wonderful white penis was soon in my hands. Mine to worship, mine to pleasure; perhaps only for a short time.
He relaxed against the couch as I went down on him; hot, hard, smooth, potent, and wonderful. His balls were big and hairy, so manly. His powerful flat stomach quivered as I deeply on his manhood.
I never wanted it to end; I wanted to suck his cock forever. Slowly, lovingly, I his big white dick. He groaned and stroked my head.
I could hear the creaking of the bed in the other room as Sam pounded my willing cousin. It made me glad.
But all things must end; I kept him hard and on the edge for a long time, but finally he wanted to end it. He grabbed my head in his hands, and started to fuck my mouth. I looked up at him as I waited for the inevitable.
His white salty rush was as much a climax for me as for him; that ultimate approval of a man.
I held his cock in my mouth as he slowly relaxed. I swallowed his come and his penis slowly deflated.
I turned as Sam's heavy footsteps came from the bedroom. He was naked, his penis hanging flaccid, still shiny with sexual fluids.
He stepped up to me, and I took his balls in my hand and his penis in my mouth, cleaning it for him.
"Didn't I tell you she was one hot gook?" He asked his friend. "You should go in the other room and have a try with Sue."
I couldn't believe it; his white cock was stiffening. What a compliment, what amazing proof of my desirability! I at him hungrily, eager to verify the possibility; could I make this man erect again?
He sat on the couch, and I buried my face between his thighs. He stroked my head and said nice things to me as I him and stroked his balls.
"You're so cute, Joon. Beautiful. I love your hair; your eyes, too. Suck me, baby, suck me deep."
He did indeed get hard, and stayed that way for long time.
It's hard to explain why I got such pleasure from serving him; it made me feel so wonderfully feminine, to hold his penis. At the same time, I so wished I could be like him, so masculine and strong.
My penis is tiny; like a matchstick. I think it's the hormones I've been taking for so long now. I suppose one really should take medical advice on these things.
He leaned forwards, and slipped my dress down my arms, exposing my breasts.
For the first time, a fondled me; it filled me with desire for him as he rolled my new nipples between his thumbs and forefingers.
He put his powerful hands under my armpits, and lifted me up onto his lap; he wrapped his arms around me, and we kissed with his penis trapped between our bodies.
I was so deliriously happy, I was momentarily oblivious of my peril as his hands moved down the bare flesh of my back, pushing my skimpy dress lower and lower.
His hand stroked my barely covered ass, and still our mouths were locked together.
Suddenly, I realized the danger; my lover would discover me any second.
"Wait. Stop." I said suddenly, pulling away; but his powerful arms wouldn't release me, I struggled in his grip helplessly.
"You've been real nice to me, and it's time for me to return the favor." He said, pulling my inadequate garment over my ass and down my thighs.
"No, please." I begged him, but he kept me pinned with one arm around my hips as he pulled my special away, revealing my pathetic little penis. He didn't actually see it; he put his hand between my legs, and grabbed it with my balls.
I was paralyzed with fear; I looked into my lover's eyes as they filled first with shock and then disgust.
He threw me off of himself so violently, I landed on the other side of the room. I broke into tears; my euphoria had turned to utter depression in seconds. He stood and retrieved his clothes without saying a word; we could hear the sounds of my cousin's bed creaking in the next room again, Steve this time pleasuring himself with Sue. How I envied her; she wasn't a fake like me, a pervert. She was all female, pure and fertile. She could be someone's one day, even bear children. All I could hope for was the occasional stolen mouthful of sperm, followed by rejection.
I just cried as Sam left. I cried and cried, until Steve finished and came out of the little bedroom. He looked around for his friend; he looked down at me. I made no effort to cover myself, no attempt to hide my shame.
"Shit." Was all he said. He dressed, then gave my cousin a kiss, and an envelope.
"What's this?" Sue asked, looking inside; then she became suddenly angry, and she threw the envelope in his face.
"You think we are whores for sale?! You take your money and go!" she shouted at him.
"Hey, I'm sorry." he said, looking confused.
Sue retrieved the envelope from the floor, and stuffed it into his jacket pocket as she pushed him out the door. It was a bit comical, since he was so huge and she so small.
She locked the door after him, and sat down on the floor beside me.
"There there, Joon" she said, holding me in her arms. "It's over now, they've gone. My poor poor little cousin."
Sue took me to Paris for a week. I just couldn't believe it; Paris! We had such fun there, I didn't want to come back. But we did, and Sam called.
"Joon Lee, I. I'm sorry, I was a bit shocked."
"I'm sorry also, Sam. It was wrong of me to deceive you; I was just so happy, and I didn't want it to end."
There was a pause, and I wondered why he had called.
"I've bought a small house, Joon." He said. "I need someone to cook and clean for me. Would you like the job?"
It upsets me a little when he sucks my silly little penis; because shouldn't do that. But it does feel nice. I love to dress up for him, and he shows me off to his friends [of course they don't know my secret].
I cook him lovely meals, clean his house and wash his clothes, and I love every minute I serve him.
I suck his cock until he begs me to let him come; eating his sperm is a privilege he often allows me. He fucks me in the ass, which hurts and brings me great joy; because I am his lover; I am his girl.
Bigby, 2002
Comments much appreciated;
bigbystories@hotmail.com
My index; http://www.asstr.org/~Bigby/Index.htm
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