T H E H O M E R V A R G A S S T O R Y A R C H I V E
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Archive name: drvargas.txt
Authors name: Homer Vargas
Story title : ASK DR. VARGAS
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Ask Dr. Vargas (MF, M+f, Manichaeism)
By Homer Vargas
Thanks to Jane Urquhart for proofreading this.
Attention: Most people will find the following transcripts
of three of Dr. Homer Vargas's advice sessions extremely
disturbing and offensive. No one without the direst need
for help with these problems should be reading this.
Children under 25 should GO AWAY!
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Ask Dr. Vargas
Greetings again. As those of you who have visited this
website before know, I am Dr. Homer Vargas, a licensed on-
line sexual therapist. The State has assigned me the
rather unpleasant duty of advising unfortunate souls who
are caught in the grip of various perversions of a sexual
origin. While I try to give scientific answers to the
questions that sinners pose to me, remember that the origin
of most problems is in the heart and evil desires of an
unregenerate soul. Prayer and self-flagellation will
enable you to deal with most problems.
Dear Dr. Vargas,
The I have been paired with for the last three
years and I have a problem. Recently we have been assigned
to produce another child, but have been having little
success. Doctors say there is nothing physiologically
wrong with either of us and that we should just 'keep
trying.' We want to do our duty and therefore have been
coupling frequently. Our problem is that we are beginning
to develop feelings for each other. When he is coupling
with me, my partner sometimes blurts out things straight
out of pornographic books like, 'I love you, darling.'
I have said things just as bad.
I'm embarrassed to tell you this, but I think the
origin of our problem is that we actually have started to
enjoy the coupling process. As a matter of fact, I think
my partner secretly enjoyed it all along. It sort of grew
on me. I was not too worried, however, until a few nights
ago. My partner has trouble with the recommended "poke and
shoot" method and had been coupling with me for nearly a
half hour, sawing his rather large penis in and out of me
with considerable energy. Suddenly I suddenly felt a
strange tingling between my legs which just grew and grew
until I was spasming and bucking and screaming incoherently
and passed out. I can't tell you the obscene words my
partner said I shouted.
When I awoke, my partner still had his arm around me,
though he was asleep. He must have delivered quite a
volume of semen into me, because it was still dribbling
out. Since the "saw and spasm" technique seemed to produce
the most semen, we have been repeating it several times
nightly. Dr. Vargas, I just don't know what to do! It
feels good! I know that's wrong, but it does. And I want
to keep on coupling and for that spasming to happen again
and again. Please help me!
You are wise to have written me and I am glad you have
decided to seek professional help with this problem before
it becomes any more ingrained. Part of your problem comes
from unhealthy reading material. If you still have any of
those vile books that sought to glorify "love" and
"affection" and - what was worse - even suggest that such
emotions properly were associated with reproduction,
destroy them immediately and tell the authorities where you
got them. Mere possession of pornography, if you come
forward and confess and help the police track down the
purveyors of this filth, will usually be punished by only a
As for the sensations you report during coupling, that
is something that does occasionally happen to unfortunate
pairs like you who have to couple repeatedly to produce
your assigned offspring. The sensation itself is just a
electrochemical event and, as such, is not blameworthy,
however troubling it may be. Moral fault comes from
actively desiring to experience the sensation as you have
confessed. For this you must go to a spiritual advisor and
follow his counsel regarding penance.
Since you must continue to couple if you are to produce
the offspring required of you, your partner and you must
find ways of making the experience truly distasteful. I
suggest you schedule your couplings at the end of
particularly stressful experiences, perhaps the penance
your spiritual advisor will impose. "When the notion
strikes" is the very worst time. Do not let your partner
couple with you for more that about five minutes at a time.
Insist that he master the "poke and shoot" like other men.
It goes without saying that he should avoid for
several days before a coupling to improve the alacrity of
For your part you can help by lying extremely still and
keeping your legs fairly tightly closed. Splayed legs are
obscene and can incite the very behavior you need to avoid.
Try keeping the lights out and coupling under covers so
neither you nor your partner sees too much of the other's
naked flesh. Repulsive as nudity is to us rationally,
during a coupling, it can excite the vilest emotions.
If you do experience "pleasurable" sensations during
coupling, do not under any circumstances allow your partner
to know this. Remain silent except to complain that "it
hurts." You can also tell him to hurry up, you've got
better things to do than lie there waiting for him to
Concerning the specific problem that drove you to
consult me, I am afraid to tell you I believe you have
experienced "orgasms." My heart goes out to you. Only a
few women are so unlucky as to experience orgasm during
coupling. Usually only perverts experience orgasm after
prolonged stimulation of the genitals with their own or
their partner's figures or - among the totally reprobate -
mouth and tongue. Avoiding these vile practices enables a
normal woman to go through life without having to deal with
orgasms. You will just have to try harder. Going without
sleep for a long period before coupling may also help.
Some experts think that being too fit may contribute to
experiencing orgasms. You might consider putting on an
extra fifty pounds or so. At the least this will help your
partner consider coupling more of the chore it was meant to
Remember, producing offspring should not be and does
not have to be pleasant. It's up to you not to let it.
Dear Dr. Vargas.
My partner and I are at the end of our rope. We have
a female offspring who had never given us any trouble until
about a year ago. She was a shy, studious, modest child.
When puberty hit, she just went crazy. It began when her
body began to change. Unfortunately she just does not fit
the "ironing board" silhouette that most want. The
poor thing found her mammaries growing and growing and
growing. By 15 she was already up to a 32A bra and the
other children in school would "moo" at her as she went by.
We suspect the social rejection had a profound effect
on her. School authorities started sending us notes that
she was refusing to wear her chador. One day she
apparently rolled up her gown and exposed the entire
expanse of flesh from the top of her socks all the way up
to her calf!
More recently she had fallen in with a gang with
obscure and disgusting habits. We believe that children in
this group pair up -- by themselves - to study, or snack,
or listen to "music." We have heard that these children --
with the acquiescence of the of some of these
delinquents -- hold hands! We have warned our offspring
that this is unhealthy, but we fear she engages in the
We have tried to interest her in normal recreational
sex allowed for hormone relief. Our local temple sponsors
events weekly at which males and females can couple
anonymously with no danger of emotional entanglement. She
refuses to attend these "orgies," as she calls them. She
insists that she only wants to be with her what's-his-name.
Yours is a growing problem, but no less real and
troubling for that. "'Everybody's problem' is a fool's
consolation." It is possible that your offspring is just
going through a phase of adolescent rebellion and has
chosen romanticism and volitionism as the handiest weapons
with which to lash out at adult society. Nevertheless, you
are right to be upset by your offspring's behavior. Can
you imagine the havoc to society if pairing decisions were
left to chance and physical attraction among children? I
do not want to alarm you, but it could happen. Children
who spend time together holding hands can grow up to be
adults who think they should choose their own mates and
make coupling and reproduction into an expression of
This is not as absurd as you may think. A few
generations ago, that was the norm, or at least the
professed ideal of the society. In practice it was not
that bad, as most people acted more like the youngsters at
your local temple.
I'm sure you have tried reasoning with your offspring.
The time has come for more drastic actions. Some well-
meaning caregivers would resort to force, but I believe
there is a better way, at least one that deserves a try.
Get her drunk. When she is very tipsy, take her to one
of the temple events you describe and let nature take its
course. Likely she will crawl home the next morning
covered in semen, having been coupled with more times than
she can remember by unknown males. If you time it
right you can probably ensure she is returns impregnated.
This will almost surely destroy her standing with the
gang she has been hanging out with and will probably create
a lasting distaste for sex that will serve her well for the
rest of her life. This may seem cruel in the short run,
but it is better than her becoming a heretic and social
outcast. Act now!
Dear Dr. Vargas,
I have always tried to live a good moral life. I had
little trouble until a few years ago when I was paired with
a woman for reproduction. Unfortunately, I got saddled
with one of those excitable ones who in addition is very
"pretty," Actually "voluptuous" is the word for her
physical type. Not all of it is her fault; no matter how
much she eats, her waist remains quite small and only her
hips and bust expand. She has tried starvation diets, too,
but can't achieve the flat-chested profile that most decent
women manage. and green eyes don't help her look
When we were first paired, at least my partner's
behavior was proper and I just had to put up with her
looks. We produced one offspring, a female, and have
been told to produce another. I want to be a good citizen,
but recently I just don't know what to do with my partner.
She has changed her appearance and attire. She refuses to
go for weekly barbering and her hair has grown quite long.
By some means I do not understand, she has caused it to
curl and fall in waves down her back. If this isn't bad
enough, she has perforated her earlobes and dangles large
gold rings from them, having painted her lips and
fingernails a garish red.
Her attire is equally outrageous. At home where no
one can see her, she puts on a garment she calls a "skirt."
This is a piece of cloth wrapped tightly around her hips
which barely covers her genitals. From somewhere she has
obtained outlandish footwear with a very high and narrow
heel. Walking in these semi-stilts causes her hips to
undulate most disturbingly and makes it more difficult not
to see beneath her "skirt." When she puts on these obscene
garments she refuses to wear the proper crotch and leg
covers. Instead, she wears a tiny triangle of cloth that
is worse than total nudity - or so I thought until she left
it off one day and I saw that she had shaved off the pubic
hear that women are said to have.
I wish I could tell you this is all, but it is not.
She apparently has gotten the idea that our couplings
should be pleasant! When we are in bed she refuses to lie
still, but writhes and bucks and rubs herself between her
legs while I am trying to reproduce. She claims that she
enjoys the process and tries to get me to practice it more
frequently. I'm sorry to say that occasionally I allow her
outrageous behavior to excite my base instincts and I give
in to her. Recently she has been goading me into coupling
with her almost once a week and the fiend still wants more!
I have tried to reason with her about this behavior,
but she is totally irrational and says that she is doing
this for *me*! The woman has come to believe that a decent
man could actually want his partner to dress and behave
this way! She says that she is "in love" with me and that
she wants us to live together for the rest of our lives
even after our offspring have become adult.
I do not believe that my partner is really evil,
however much her behavior may suggest she is. I wish her
no ill, but I fear that if I remain in the situation, her
behavior may start to rub off on me.
Please help me!
From what you have written, I can determine that your
partner is more than just seriously delusional. She has
criminal intent. Your course is obvious. Get out! It is
especially important that you act immediately because your
partner is exposing an innocent female offspring to an
extremely inappropriate role model.
It is clear to me that your partner has come under the
influence, whether from some person or through banned
literature, with the concept of Christian "marriage." Few
would recognize it nowadays, but this was a common practice
during earlier times. Christianity, which you probably
have not heard of, is a kind of heresy of orthodox
Manichaeism. It rejects our belief in the dualistic
struggle of Good and Evil in the world with the Evil
principle dragging us down through our material natures
while the Good tries to lift us toward pure spirituality.
Sex we recognize as the principal snare of the Evil One.
Christians, on the other hand, believed that the world,
though infused by much evil, was essentially good, having
been "redeemed" by the death and miraculous resuscitation
of their culture-hero, one "Jesus," whom they called
"Christ." This erroneous tenet led them to believe that
the union of and woman in "marriage," in addition to
its procreative function, should also be an expression of
love and affection. Although it sounds almost too obscene
to be spoken, they held that the "marriage" between
"husband" and "wife" was somehow ("mysteriously")
emblematic of the union of Christ with all believers, which
they called the "church." Although your partner's actions
are even by the standards of that perverse creed,
she evidently rejects our belief that sex is necessarily
How, you may ask, could any society based on such
disgusting beliefs hold together for a week, much less two
thousand years. The answer is that Christians seldom took
their absurd beliefs to their obvious conclusions. Then
too, they were fortunate that some of their early thinkers,
"Fathers of the Church," they were called, advanced ideas
that were not too far from Manichaeism. Augustine of
Hippo, a libertine in his youth, developed a doctrine of
"Original Sin" (the only Christian doctrine for which there
is empirical proof, one of their wits said). This Sin
Augustine linked closely to sexual desire. His and similar
teaching, plus a healthy patriarchy that found sexuality of
women especially troubling, gave them a set of actions that
few Manacheans would find objectionable.
Excuse me if you found this theological background
boring, but it is necessary for you to understand just how
depraved your partner is and why you must sever the bond
with her as soon as possible. Normally the authorities
frown on a partner who refuses to live with his or her
assigned pair as this smacks of "volitionism." In you
case, I'm sure you will have no problem. Indeed, to allow
a female offspring to live in a household with a woman such
as you describe would be tantamount to child abuse.
Save yourself and your offspring. Denounce and
separate yourself from this evil woman.
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