Courier Series FAQ
By
Nikolai Mirovich
Note: This is just a short(?) list of frequently asked questions about my series of perversely romantic and occasionally darkly disturbing pokemon stories, sent in by my fans.
This isn't anything perverted, it's just an FAQ, so if you don't care, just back pedal and read one of the stories. This is just here to help people.
Q) How are the characters?
A) Okay, due to the fact that I cannot seem to get a straight answers out of people (as in the questions lead to massive circular debates) as to what years the Pokemon series begins and ends in. Or just how most of the people are to start with, this is sort of a tough one to answer. But, let me put it to you this way. There's a 2 and a half year age difference between Miranda and Misty. (Yes, there's a VERY obscure inside joke in there, and if you get it, please stop licking those cane toads!)
Q) Why is Misty's staryu named "Shadow" when her other pokemon are
named after mythical water monsters and water deities?
A) Not so simply put, it's an inside joke. But in all fairness, I
shall try and explain it. You see, two of my friends (Who's
actual, real-life nicknames are "Alt135" & "Hot Dog" for various
obscure reasons) were sitting around, being bored.
So, Hot started playing Final Fantasy VII (Although some
people still call it "III"), and as he's playing the
game, my Alt135 asks, "Isn't there a ninja in this
game?"
Hot nods. "Yeah, but I'm not sure what to call him."
This of course brings up this strange debate as to the ninja in
that games gender, which somehow brings up another game with a
ninja called "Dead Or Alive". (I'm pretty sure it's a fighting
game of some kind or other) It turns out that the female ninja in
that game is called "Kasumi". So, as a joke, Hot renames the
ninja in FF VI from "Shadow" to "Kasumi".
So, a while later, I'm playing the new, ultra cool with extra
FMV's version of FFVI on Hot Dog's new game machine thingy. And
well, that day we'd been discussing pokemon for some
unconscionable reason, and I mentioned to him that in the
original Japanese version, Misty's name is actually Kasumi, which
means (apparently) "mist". So, a few hours later, I wound up
getting the ninja myself, and poor shadow became "Misty". (The
fact that my group of friends had decided that he was indeed male
aside.)
Then, later on when I got the emulated an emulated version of the
Pokemon game from a friend of mine who's nickname is both my
favorite colour and my favorite flavor of ice-cream, I found out
that the staryu/starmie was a pretty kickin' pokemon.
Unfortunately, I wasn't sure what to name the poor overgrown
starfish. So, I played it for a while, until one day I was on an
obscure knowledge hunt through the internet and found a site
that said that staryu's were Misty's favorite type of pokemon.
So, for a while, I named my staryu Misty.
Of course, in this story, it'd be silly for Misty to name her
pokemon after herself, so, in this story, her staryu is named
"Shadow", after everyone's favorite bishonin ninja in Final
Fantasy Six. Confused yet? I am! But just do like I do, blame
Alt135!!!
Q) When will you write a sequel?
A) Well, to be honest, the series will take as long to publish as
it takes. At present, I'm hoping for a minimum of 2 a
year. 3 If I'm feeling lucky.
Q) How many will there be?
A) I think about 12-14. I'm not sure. I have some ideas for the
ending, but I need to get there first.
Q) Don't you think that you're a touch hard on Ash/Satoshi? He's
THAT bad!
A) I'm tempted to stand here and grin evilly, but instead I'll say
this; This is the way my mind works. While I'm sure that all the
characters will all grow up to be nice, well adjusted members of
the rather odd society they live in, what fun would THAT be?!
This is a parallel universe version of Pokemon, boils and
ghouls. Just like my Tentacle Romance series is a parallel
Sailor Moon universe. Don't take it so personally/seriously.
When I write a fanfic, the gloves are off. The series is my pig!
(I honestly don't know who first coined that phrase, but I think
it was my same friend who was thrown out of no less than FIVE
buffet houses to the sound of "Eat More Vegetables!")
Anyway, in MY Pokemon universe, things just kinda got out of
control. Basically, I've amplified several of the character's
worst traits to odd levels. I find it makes for a better story,
and let's people who know NOTHING about Pokemon feel less
alienated. Also, I just plane don't like Ash. I just find it odd
that someone could be so obsessed with Pokemon but know sooo
little about them. I have other reasons to, but that just spark
more debates. <sigh>
Q) When does your take place?
A) After the end of the Pokemon series. I'm afraid I can't be more
specific at this time.
Q) Where's Togapi?
A) An omelet? Sorry. Flat out here, I don't like it. The species
simply doesn't exist in my world. I'm sorry, but it's my world,
and I reserve the right to be a complete jerk in regards to
things staying/going.
Q) Why is it that pokemon seem capable of independent thought
while in battle?
A) Okay, so that's not the EXACT wording of the question as sent
to me, but hey, you get the idea. Anyway, it's like this. I
think it's silly that pokemon have to rely 100% on human
intervention during combat. Realistically, these critters
(especially the carnivores) are going to be able to defend
themselves perfectly well in most situations. The human element
factors in when things start to go beyond the pokemon's normal
way of thinking. The trainer's job is mostly to fill in the
blanks of the poke's combat strategy as well as add an extra bit
of creativity. After all, that's what humans do, they create and
they think on a higher level than even the smartest pokemon.
Without the trainer giving the occasional (but hardly
incessant!) order, battle might not be as interesting, and would
on occasion be more lethal (again, especially when dealing with
the more predatory types.)
Oh, and for the record, I find the whole 'every move is up to
the trainer' thing infinitely bogus and annoying.
Q) Why?! Why for the love of all Creation are you writing a
Pokemon story? Let alone a series of them?!
A) <Shrug> I dunno. Ask my Twisted Muse. It just kinda, I dunno,
happened. To be honest it embarrasses me to admit to it, but
here I am, getting up before work every day to bang out a few
more pages of this thing. I just hope I can entertain a few
people with it. Tis all.
Okay, that's it. You can go back to masturbating now.:)
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