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Dave and Diane: Part Four
Written by AnnabelleandJay Comments to: email@example.com
Chapter Four- Bottoms and Tops
Diane Stone opened her legs wider apart t allowing the naked on top of her to pump his cock even deeper into her swollen cunt.
"Yes, fuck me! Harder! Harder!" she moaned.
The was a god, tanned, muscular, and gorgeous. She rubbed his
sweating, naked body with it's rippling muscles as he pounded into her,
each stroke going deeper and deeper. She touched his large muscular chest
and rubbed at the large number "8" painted there. Despite the sweat
pouring out of this Adonis, the number emblazoned on his chest in black
paint, remained unsmeared. She could tell from the urgency in his pumping
hips and the straining muscles of his neck and face, that he was about to
cum inside her. She could feel her churning with the seminal deposits
from numbers one through seven. They had all been equally young, gorgeous
and well hung. And now number "8" began to shower after into
the mix in her brimming vagina. She had been so careful not to lose a drop
of the precious liquid from numbers one through seven. She clamped down
hard, struggling to hold it all in, as number "8" withdrew and number "9"
slid his large, angry cock into her.
"Ahhhhhhh," she wailed. "Yeeeessssssss! Fuck me!" she screamed as her
body edged toward sensory overload.
"9" was magnificent, dark and exotic. She grabbed at his back and dug
in with her nails as the olive-skinned youth responded with powerful lunges
inside her. His black, curly hair shook as he rammed deeper, hoping to
elicit another scream from her.
"Oooooohhhhhhhhh," Diane howled, as "9" pulled his hard penis completely
out of her and drove it back in, as if to both torture and tease her.
Diane reached up and grabbed a handful of his black curls and pulled his
face down onto her sweat soaked breast. "9" hungrily devoured her nipple,
sucking and licking as he pumped away. He ground his pelvic bone roughly
against her shaved mound and soon she could tell that he had started down
the irreversible path to orgasm. Faster and faster "9" jammed his hips
deep into her and soon Diane saw his Mediterranean features contort in
pleasure and pain as he joined "1" through "8" in filling her womb with his
With choreographed smoothness, "9" withdrew and "10" was on top of her.
Diane wondered if "10" was both his number and his size, as the slid his huge penis into her gaping slit. Again, she had fought
hard not to allow the smallest drop of semen to escape, but this beautiful
farm was making that a difficult task. His cock burrowed deep
into her as she could feel the sticky fluid inside her slosh aside,
displaced by his width.
"Yes! Come on! Come on!" she whispered in encouragement, as the
muscular grabbed her legs and lifted them to rest on top of his
broad shoulders, giving him a better angle to drive deep into her cunt.
His large hands wrapped around her knees as he bounced her with every
thrust of his cock. She felt like a rag doll in the hands of this large
Iowa boy, as he pounded his hips into her. The entire room seemed to
shake as "10" repeatedly plunged the entire length of his cock deep into
her lifted hips, her wet body slapping against his.
With a tremendous yell, "10" fell forward on top of Diane and grabbed
her, crushing his body against hers as he shot his semen deep into her
already filled tunnel. She would have yelled also, but he had driven all
of the air out of her as he crushed her against his body. Diane struggled
to catch her breath as the fiercely clung to her, with wave
after wave of his warmth filling her. Finally spent, he slid out of her
and off of the bed.
Again, Diane fiercely worked to keep every drop of the milky inside
her as she looked over to see Dave, her husband, lying next to her on the
bed. In one quick move, she lifted her leg and threw herself across Dave,
now positioned with his face directly under her crotch. Instantly she
dropped her overflowing down onto Dave's open mouth and she began to
drain the deposits of the ten into Dave's waiting mouth, as he eagerly on her wide opening.
"DIANE! DIANE! What are we going to do?" Brenda, her Assistant
Director shouted, waking Diane Stone from her daydream. She had mentally
slipped off during the critical management meeting and now she was totally
lost in following the discussion, as everyone in the room stared at her.
"Damn," Diane thought to herself. "This is not good," she thought,
berating herself for wandering off into a sexual fantasy during this crisis
meeting. She had wanted to stay focused today, but her body was on fire in
anticipation of the night to come. She thought that perhaps she was
becoming a sex addict. It was all she thought about lately. Maybe it was
the fact that she just turned 50 years-old. Or maybe it was hormones. She
didn't know. But whatever it was, she had discovered just how much she
really loved sex.
"So, tell me again. What's the problem?" Diane questioned, trying to
exude the calm leadership skills that had taken her to the top management
ranks of a major corporation. Another assistant answered, "It's the
software again! The entire company global network is freezing up! It just
With calm assurance, Diane stood and said, "Be calm. I'll deal with
it," and she walked out of the meeting room. She walked down the hall and
into the large, cubicled workspace of the technology staff. She saw Mark,
her company's computer technology wizard, slumped at his desk, staring at
his computer screen. Diane smiled to herself and thought, "All right,
let's see if this worm is ready for the bitch from hell!" Pretending to be
outraged, Diane stormed across the floor and toward Mark's desk. Nearby
staff members recognized the long, determined strides of her walk and
instantly ran for cover.
"MARK!" she roared, as she approached his desk. "You're making this
company look bad. You're making this division look bad." Then, Diane
leaned over an in her best dominating voice and said, "And worst of all,
you're making me look bad."
"Yes, Ms. Stone. I know it's not working and I'm sorry the program's
not up and running properly yet," Mark sniveled.
Inside, Diane was giddy as she relished her tough, dominating
performance with Mark. He was beginning to squirm, exactly as she knew he
"Mark, just look at this! I'll give you three days, and then I want it
fixed. I want it perfect!" Diane said firmly, as she leaned over Mark's
desk in his cubicle and clicked the mouse on his computer indicating a
flashing error message on the screen. Mark was one of her best technology
geniuses, who had recently come to her for help with his personal life. As
his boss, Diane had reluctantly agreed to talk to his much younger wife,
Lisa. She agreed to see if she could fix their marital problems and get
Mark back to his computer brilliance for the company.
Diane looked at her hand moving the mouse and smiled. "Oh, Mark, if you
only knew where this hand was last night," Diane thought to herself, as she
remembered pushing her entire hand into Lisa's tight anal passage. She had
fisted the young, twenty-year-old in the ass while Diane's husband,
Dave, fisted Lisa's vagina. And Lisa had loved every minute of it,
professing herself to be Diane and Dave's slave, willing to do whatever
they asked of her.
"And, Mark, Lisa will be in marriage counseling with me every night for
the next few days. Now get to work on fixing the program." Diane said,
putting on her best dominating voice.
Diane had realized in talking to both Mark and Lisa that they were both
natural submissives. Their two-year marriage was limping disastrously
along and Mark's work had gone straight into the toilet. Diane, now with
her husband's help, was determined to help the marriage and return Mark to
being a much-needed company asset.
"Yes, Ms. Stone," Mark eagerly responded. "And, thank you, thank you
"I'm not promising anything, but I think I can help Lisa," Diane said
and offered a handshake as she started to return to her office.
Instead of shaking her hand, Mark took it and kissed it, as a servant
might do to royalty. "Oh, thank you, Diane. I mean Ms. Stone," Mark
groveled and kissed her hand again. Five years ago, Mark had called her
Diane all the time when they worked together on company projects. Now, she
was Ms. Stone. "This is almost too easy,' Diane said smiling to herself
as she returned to her office.
Last night, Lisa had been willing to do anything to please Diane and
Dave. After several hours of hot fucking, and even fisting, they
sent Lisa home with strict orders to return the following night. As Diane
sat back down at her desk, she reflected on the plan that she and Dave had
come up with for tonight's session with Lisa. A weak submissive, Lisa was
a young, pale-skinned with a body that Diane thought looked like
that of a Barbie doll. The really was all legs and breasts. And Lisa
had proved to be hotter than anyone suspected, displaying incredible oral
skills on both Dave and Diane.
"Honey, you're the best I've ever seen, but that could
challenge your crown," Dave joked to Diane last night, as they discussed
their plans to help the company and the marriage of Mark and Lisa.
"Well, maybe I'll just have to try a little harder. And speaking of a
little harder…" Diane said playfully, as she pulled the down zipper on Dave
trousers and slipped his rigid penis into her mouth. Their marriage of
twenty-five years had hit a plateau until three weeks ago, when Dave had
given Diane a wild 50th birthday/25th anniversary present. He gave her a
night in a hotel room with twenty well-endowed men. During the course of
the evening she had not only rediscovered her own sexuality, but with the
help of the twenty men, a dog, and some photos Dave took of the evening,
they had rekindled the sexual heat in their marriage. Now they were acting
as highly sexed as teenagers, constantly aroused and unable to keep their
hands off of one another. The challenge with Lisa and Mark emerged and
opened an entirely new erotic chapter in their lives when Diane gave Lisa
to Dave as his belated anniversary present.
At her desk, Diane picked up the phone and called Dave to check on
preparations for tonight. Her plan seemed simple. She intended to turn
Lisa into a top - a dominant woman, who would then enjoy having her
submissive husband, Mark. The trick was how to make that change happen.
She heard Dave say that he was working on that now.
"Great," she said, hanging up the phone. "Now let's see if we can pull
this off," Diane excitedly thought to herself. She knew they couldn't do
it in one night, but this would be a start.
As 7 p.m. approached, Diane was all prepared. Tonight, she wore a
black patent leather bustier, which pushed her 36D up and out. The
bustier garters held up a pair of shiny, black latex stockings. Dave found
them for her at a kinky boutique and she loved them. The 5 inch black
patent stiletto heels took her 5'10" body to a towering 6'3". A wide,
studded, black patent choker was around her neck and tonight her lips were
a dark blood red. She was a perfect of intimidation. Dave had
joined the masquerade in black leather biker jeans and black chrome studded
leather vest. Earlier, they had tried their outfits on and ended up
fucking for over an hour. Dave had twice in her and she now had
plans for the semen trying to run down her legs. She pressed her legs
together and waited for the arrival of her gorgeous slave.
Lisa arrived promptly at 7 o'clock and Diane threw the front door open
before the woman could even press the doorbell. Lisa was dressed in
the same type of flowery, cotton sack that she had on yesterday when they
first met for lunch.
"Strip, slave! Right here!" Diane demanded, as the shocked jumped
It was growing dark and Diane knew that their neighbors couldn't see
anything, but she didn't want Lisa to know that. Lisa bowed her head and
stripped off the cotton dress, bra and panties. She stood naked at the
front door as Diane scowled at her. The had shaved her pubic hair as
ordered the previous night and stood there hoping for a reward from her
mistress for following orders. But the reward did not come.
"Spread your legs!" Diane snapped. "I want my neighbors to see what a
slut you are. Turn around! Now bend over!"
Lisa obediently did as she was told and bent over with her naked ass
turned up to Diane for inspection. Diane lifted the riding crop she had
placed by the door and brought it down hard against the blonde's round ass.
Lisa didn't make a sound as Diane lifted the crop a second time and brought
it down even harder. Two bright marks angled across the woman's
ass, as she remained bent over. Again and again Diane struck out at the
creamy ass sticking up toward her until a total of ten welts striped
the girl's white ass.
"Stand up and turn around!" Diane ordered. "Don't ever come to me
dressed like that again. I expect my slave to be appropriately attired
when you arrive."
"Yes, Mistress," Lisa muttered.
"Now, stand up straight and pull your shoulders back. A slave of mine
must be proud! Now walk over there and show my neighbors the stripes on
your ass, so they will know what happens to disobedient slaves," Diane
demanded, gesturing to the front walk.
Lisa hesitated a moment too long before starting down the walkway and
Diane brought the crop quickly down across the girl's out jutting breasts.
"NOW!" Diane snarled.
Lisa turned, stuck out her as ordered, and reluctantly moved
back down the walkway, slowly turned, proudly showing off her marks,
and returned to the door.
"Good," Diane said and softly kissed the woman on the mouth.
Slipping her hand between Lisa's legs, she slowly inserted several fingers
into the girl's wet vagina. "Good. You shaved as you were told," Diane
said and kissed her again. "Now come in and get dressed."
Diane walked in with Lisa following closely, as Dave stood on the other
side of the room. Diane could tell by Lisa's quick gasp that she had just
noticed the naked standing in the corner of the room. There, standing
perfectly still and silent in the corner, was a tall, handsome in his
early 30's. He wore a collar and his hands were cuffed behind his neck
and fastened to the collar.
Diane knew immediately what Lisa was focused on. Lisa was staring at
the man's extraordinary cock. It was flaccid and a dangling ten inches.
But more unusual was the fact that it was so wide, perhaps three inches in
"That's another slave in training. You will pay no attention to him
unless ordered. Now, go service your Master and then get dressed," Diane
instructed. Lisa walked over to Dave, knelt down in front of him, and
without a word, opened his zipper and pulled out his cock. She immediately
slipped it into her mouth and began sucking.
"She is good," Diane said to herself, smiling and enjoying the sight, as
she watched her husband pump his engorged cock into the blonde's mouth.
She could tell Dave was about to come as he grabbed two handfuls of Lisa's
blonde tresses and pulled her face firmly into his crotch, sinking his
stiff cock deep into her throat. Lisa let out a muffled whimper as Dave's
cock drove deep causing the to gag, before she was ready take him down
her throat. This only caused Dave to push deeper as he pulled Lisa's head
harder toward him. Diane saw all of the muscles in her husband's body
tense as he flooded the girl's mouth and throat with his juice. Diane was
amazed that Dave could generate so much having just filled her twice an
hour ago. But Lisa seemed to have a gift for getting of extra semen
from Dave's balls. "Wow," Diane murmured to herself, watching the clean the last drops of from her husband's cock. Without a word, the
girl got to her feet and left the room to get dressed.
"That's three times in an hour. Not bad," Diane said moving over to her
husband and kissing him. "That's got to be a new record for you."
"Yeah," Dave said grinning. "And please remind me never to you
off. I saw the welts on her ass."
They both quietly laughed, kissed quickly and Diane moved away to stand
near the naked in the corner. He was one of the many Dave had
screened some weeks ago to participate in Diane's anniversary present, the
hotel gangbang. Last night when Diane told Dave her plan, Dave had
remembered Thomas. Thomas was memorable not for the unusual dimensions of
his cock, but because he really loved being dominated by women. Dave had
rejected Thomas for the party since that wasn't what that evening was all
about, but this was a perfect reason to contact him. And sure enough,
after several emails, Thomas was a willing participant in tonight's
Diane could feel a tingle between her legs as Lisa emerged from the
room. She had laid out the girl's outfit, but could not have anticipated
her appearance. Lisa stepped out wearing a tight, white satin bustier that
highlighted the woman's luscious 34 C breasts, pushing them up into
generous mounds. The white and white satin garterbelt framed her
transparent white, crotchless panties, which allowed her newly shaved to emerge when she walked. Full-length white satin gloves adorned her
hands and arms and the white patent high heels made Lisa six feet of Ice
Goddess. Diane flushed with anticipation and noted that Lisa had put on
makeup since her arrival. Diane took that as a good sign, since Lisa
wasn't told to do so.
"Come over here!" Diane directed, noting with pleasure that the
appearance of the 20 year-old also aroused her husband. She smiled at
Dave, and then spoke. "Your Master has a treat for you. He has filled me
with for you."
Lisa reached out and placed her hands on Diane's round hips and lowered
the woman to the floor. Her white-gloved hands slowly ran down
Diane's black clad legs and spread them wide apart. Slowly, the
young moved her face inches from Diane's cunt, as Diane could feel
the semen stored inside her beginning to seep out. Hungrily, Lisa began to
lap at Diane's flowing cunt, working to gather every drop of cum. Diane
could feel Lisa's mouth at her womb, trying to draw out all of the
"God, I think she's going to try and stick her entire head up my cunt,"
Diane thought to herself, as the pushed her face deeper and
deeper inside Diane's generous opening. After several minutes of Lisa's
oral attention, Diane felt herself about to slip into a huge orgasmic abyss
and totally lose control of the evening, as Lisa hungrily lapped and at her cunt.
"Damn!" Diane thought, frustrated at wanting the impending orgasm but
angry knowing that it would not help her plan for the evening. Grabbing
the nearby riding crop, Diane swung it hard at Lisa's upturned ass. The
young woman was taken totally by surprise and let out a yelp from the pain,
as the crop bit into her ass.
"STOP!" Diane yelled. "I can tell that you are enjoying yourself!
Slaves only receive pleasure when they are allowed. Do you understand?"
and with that Diane snapped the crop again across Lisa's ass.
"Yes, Mistress," Lisa softly replied, lifting her face from Diane's and licking the and vaginal juices from around her mouth.
"Good. Now watch as I teach you the proper way to use a slave," Diane
ordered, as she arose and walked over to Thomas, tied and stretched along
"God, look at the size of that cock," Diane mused to herself. "And it's
not even hard yet."
Turning to Lisa, Diane said, "Come over her slave and lick this
Lisa immediately scrambled over and fell to her knees and instantly
began to lick the dangling, flaccid cock in front of her face. After
several minutes, Diane yelled, "Enough! Now, slip this ring on his cock
and slide it all the way down to the base. A male slave is only good so
long as he is hard, and this will keep him hard." With that, Diane handed
the a shiny, metal cock ring. The steel ring was clearly much smaller
that Thomas' cock and Lisa struggled to stuff the wide dick
through the opening using only her saliva as lubricant.
"Fool!" Diane shrieked. "Don't be gentle with it. Push it on there!
And if you keep playing with him, it will become hard and you will never
get it on!" Again, Diane brought the riding crop down, this time across
Lisa's tender inner thigh, inches away from her now-swollen and damp
"Well, she certainly enjoys being the submissive," Diane thought to
herself, staring at the girl's glistening lips. "Let's hope she takes
to being on top."
Lisa struggled for several minutes more before finally jamming the metal
ring down hard onto the base of the cock. The attention and handling was
clearly having an effect on Thomas, as his huge member began to grow
"Good," Diane told Lisa. "Now suck his cock a little so we can see how
hard it will get. Here take this," Diane added. "If he is getting
pleasure from you and you don't want him to, use this." Diane handed the
girl the riding crop and gestured for her to begin. Obeying Diane's
command, Lisa slowly opened her mouth and began to press the huge penis
head past her lips.
Diane looked over her shoulder at her husband and flashed him a smile
and a wink. "I am having entirely too much fun with this," Diane thought
The began hungrily gobbling down the meaty, blood engorged
penis, which had expanded to huge proportions.
"NOOOO!" screamed Diane, grabbing the crop away from Lisa and quickly
bringing it down across her back.
"Slave, can't you see that this worthless thing is enjoying this. He's
pushing out his hips for his own pleasure," Diane instructed, handing the
crop back to Lisa.
"Now, punish him!" Diane ordered.
Lisa raised the crop and with a half-hearted effort, brought it timidly
down across Thomas' naked chest.
"No!!" Diane screeched, grabbing the crop again, this time striking
Lisa's exposed ass with a vicious blow.
"Again! Harder!" Diane commanded. "And on his slave cock!"
Doing as she was ordered and fearing for another lashing on her own ass,
Lisa lifted the riding crop and brought it down as hard as she could on the
bobbing erection. Again Lisa lashed out onto the man's naked thighs.
Another sharp blow landed on his sagging testicles, causing the to groan, but Diane sensed there was more pleasure than pain in the moan.
Ten more times Lisa delivered punishment to Thomas' rigid cock, which
seemed only to mock her by growing harder and harder as it rebounded from
each stroke. Inside, Diane was disappointed. Lisa obviously feared and
disliked striking the naked man.
"Enough! Good!" Diane told Lisa. "Now let's see if this slave is
worthy of you, my dear," Diane said and kissed her deeply as a reward.
Diane walked over to Thomas and, using his large erection as a handle,
pulled him down onto the floor and onto his back.
"Now, remember," she said to Lisa, "a slave is to be used to please you
– as you would use any other piece of property. This slave is now only a
piece of furniture. You will now use him as a chair. I want you to sit on
his face and smother him with your cunt. When you choose, let him come up
"But I can't…" stammered Lisa.
Lisa's momentary hesitation at the command brought a sharp and stinging
reminder across her backside with the crop. Instantly, she stepped over
Thomas' face and dropped down on top of him, spreading the fabric of the
crotchless wide as she settled in. Within moments, Lisa had
completely covered his nose and mouth with her damp as she brought all
of her weight to bear on his face. After a minute, she lifted her hips
slightly and heard the gasp for air as he filled his lungs. As
instructed, she ground her vaginal opening back onto his face.
"Excellent," Diane urged. "Now let's see what else this furniture can
do." With that, Diane straddled the man's bucking hips, lifted his cock until it was pointed directly upward, then dropped hard down onto it,
plunging it deep into her wetness and forcing the remaining air out of
Thomas' body. Three weeks ago, Diane would never have been able to
accommodate his huge cock, but the New Diane had little trouble as his
extraordinarily wide cock disappeared easily inside her. Lisa reluctantly
ground her onto Thomas' face and finally when it seemed he could take
no more, raised her hips again and allowed one quick breath.
Diane began pounding away on the man's body, riding his massive cock as
Lisa parceled out oxygen. Diane bounced up and down as she smiled at Dave
nearby, who was filming the entire episode with his camcorder, seeing that
the two women had matters clearly in hand. Time and again, Lisa would push
Thomas to the edge of asphyxiation, allow him breath, and then clamp her
dripping opening back over his face. The situation became critical as
Thomas approached orgasm, struggling for air to fuel his heaving body. At
the moment of his eruption, Diane felt his hot juices explode in her and
coat her insides with his hot as he heaved and twisted to free his
"Harder, press harder!" Diane directed Lisa, who was clearly reluctant
to use more force to restrain Thomas. Diane reached out and grabbed Lisa's
bare nipples and began to squeeze the hard buds until Lisa winced with
"Slave, hold him still and do not let him breathe until I release your
nipples!" Diane ordered.
Lisa pressed even harder down onto Thomas' face as his body lurched and
struggled. At the last possible moment, Diane released Lisa's nipples.
She watched as the lifted herself off of the struggling man's
mouth and Diane heard him gasping for breath.
"Switch places," Diane demanded. Lisa scrambled quickly off Thomas'
face. In an instant, Diane pulled off of his still rigid cock, turned
around and straddled his face. With dripping out between her legs,
Diane mashed her swollen vaginal lips onto his face, clamping her sex over
his nose and mouth.
The metal cock ring had indeed done it job and despite having just cum,
Thomas' engorged cock, now purple, was still rock hard. Lisa took the
massive organ and with some difficult, gradually stuffed all of the meat
into her vaginal slit. The two women then began again, this time with
Diane controlling their slave's breathing and Lisa pounding up and
down, repeatedly impaling herself on the massive cock.
"Oh, this is heaven," Diane thought to herself, as she felt the face of
the writhing thrash between her thighs. She could feel the remnants of
his dripping out of her and into his gaping mouth.
"That's good, slave, " she said. "Service me properly and I'll give you
a little air as a reward." These words only increased the shaking and
flailing between her legs.
"Now, pump harder! Push your cock into my little slave slut," Diane
ordered, and Thomas responded with a wild, chaotic thrusting of his hips.
The bucking was so hard that Lisa was dislodged from his rigid member and
went flying off into the air and fell onto her side. Thomas' slimy cocked
bounced madly in the air for a second then erupted, sending an arc of semen
shooting into space. Large globs of plopped down onto the floor around
Diane, realizing that Thomas' struggle for air was now real and
desperate, quickly lifted her dripping opening off of his face. Diane
stood as the gasped for air, his naked chest heaving up and down.
"Well, that a little better, but still pitiful!" Diane said in a harsh
tone, hoping that her feigned anger would ring true. "We'll have to do
better tomorrow night or I'll whip both of you until you can't sit down!"
Diane sent Lisa home with strict orders to return the following night
for her next lesson. Thomas, however, was not so quickly dispatched.
"I think I'll leave the collar and cuffs on and put you on a leash.
Maybe I'll walk you into my office tomorrow just as you are for all to see,
as my new canine stud," Diane taunted Thomas as he lay on the floor.
Refusing to unlock the handcuffs, Diane stood smiling with a thin, spiked
heel firmly planted on his chest. She put a little more weight on it than
she knew would be comfortable and said, "Why don't we do that. I'll take
you to the office as my canine and let walk around naked."
As soon as the words came out of her mouth, Diane realized the effect
the threatened public humiliation was having on Thomas. His huge cock
sprang back to life. Turning to her husband, Diane smiled.
"Well, it would be a terrible shame to waste that, wouldn't it?" she
said to Dave. "I think I'll take him with me to work tomorrow. Let's see
if he can stay hard all day at my office."
"Excellent, " Dave said, picking up on Diane's playfulness. "And while
you play with him, I'll take our little Lisa out and see if we can find her
something acceptable to wear."
"Ooooooo, I like that," Diane teased gleefully. "Maybe a new outfit
will bring out the new Lisa."
To Be Continued in
Dave and Diane Part 5 - The Best Laid Plans