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REMOTE hurt yourself when you shut the

The following piece of fiction contains strong sexual
content and is meant to be read only by adults. If you
are not at least 18 years old, or if you are offended by
this type of material, please do not read any further.

"Remote-Control Wife"

by DG
I woke up to the sound of Cindy singing in the shower. I yawned
and turned my head to look at the clock. It was almost nine, and the
winter sun was streaming in through the triangular windows set up high
in the wall, bathing the big room in a cozy glow. I closed my eyes to
catch a few more minutes, but it's impossible to sleep when Cindy is
singing. It's not that she can't carry a tune, she actually has rather
pleasant soprano. The problem is that she never remembers the lyrics,
so she hums and mumbles and makes things up as she goes along.

"...Are you strong enough to be my man?

...Lie...with me.

...Eat pie...with me.

...But don't leave..."

Not quite the way Sheryl Crow wrote it. I pulled the covers aside
and got to my feet. I don't want to sound like a whiner. Today was
Cindy's birthday, and she was entitled to sing all she wanted.

The door to the bathroom was open just a crack, and tendrils of
steam were drifting lazily out into the bedroom. I eased the door open
a few more inches. As usual, she had left the fan off and the bathroom
was wall-to-wall fog.

"...Are you strong enough to be my man?"

I could only occasionally make out Cindy's ghostly form moving
around behind the glass doors of our oversized shower stall. Feeling
like an actor in a bad action movie, I waited until I thought her back
was turned and then slipped though the door and pressed against the
wall, breathing in the thick, sweet smell of shampoo and conditioner.

"...Are you strong enough to be my man?

...Are you long enough to be my man?"

This latest was followed by a cackle of delight.

I peeled off my t-shirt, trying not to make any sudden movements.
Then I stepped out of my boxer shorts. Unfortunately, my cock was
already as stiff as a coat peg, and I slipped and almost fell as I
yanked my boxer shorts down.

"DG, is that you?"

The slim outline of my wife materialized behind the glass. The
outline became more substantial, and then two round, distinct circles of
flesh appeared as she pressed her breasts against the door.

"I really hope that's you, honey."

She waited a few seconds, then moved away from the glass, leaving
behind a little steam-free area the shape of an infinity sign.

"...Are you long enough to be my man?"

...Are you hard enough to be my man?

...Lie...with me

...eat my pie...for me."

Her singing voice was getting downright lascivious. I heard the
sound of the shower change from a constant stream to a pulse, and I
smiled to myself. I moved quickly across the bathroom and opened the
shower door.

"Aha! Caught ya, babe."

My wife was sitting on the built-in stone bench, holding the
removable chrome shower head in her hand. Cindy is a petite brunette
with a lean, fit body and a face that generates double takes from men.
Her long hair was smoothed back around one shoulder, and her brown eyes
sparkled at me through the steam.

"This pulse mode is great for getting the lint out from between my
toes," she said innocently. Her eyes dropped to my midsection. "Don't
hurt yourself when you shut the door, sweetie."

I shut the door, being careful not to get anything caught, and
said "I'm sorry. I thought you might be using the shower to pleasure

"Hmm. You mean like this?"

She changed the setting from a heavy pulse to a shimmering,
hissing torrent and then aimed the stream at the neat patch of curly
hair between her legs. The water streamed down through the cleft of her
pussy and over her thighs, bubbling and hissing like a mountain

I dropped to my knees at the end of the bench and spread her legs
farther apart, and Cindy dropped the shower head and eagerly slithered
down until she was lying on her back with her hips off the edge. When
we remodeled the master bath a few years ago, we designed the shower
bench to accommodate just this sort of activity.

"Happy birthday, babe!" I pushed my erection down until it was
aimed at its target.

"Is that my present you've got there?"

"This is just for starters," I assured her. "I've got a full day
planned." I thrust forward, and let out an involuntary moan of pleasure
as I slid into her warm love tunnel. There's nothing like the feeling
of sharing a raging morning woodie with your special someone.

After just a few seconds, I knew that my performance wasn't going
to earn me the nickname "iron man." In fact, it was all I could do to
keep from going off early like a defective grenade. I forced myself to
slow the pace a little and then I picked up the shower head, which was
still gushing warm bubbly water.

Like my buddy Bart used to tell me, women don't care how long you
last, as long as it's a few seconds longer than they do.

I switched back over to pulse mode and aimed the spray directly at
her clit.

"Oooh," she said appreciatively. "Now that's a birthday treat."

The only problem was that the stream of water was cascading down
around my overfilled balls, adding another source of stimulation. It
was going to be close.

"Oh! Honey...I'm..." She didn't finish her sentence, but the way
her eyes rolled up in her head and every muscle in her body suddenly
tensed spoke volumes.

"Me too," I grunted. I pulled out and sprayed a generous load of
sticky come all over her stomach and breasts.


Cindy was laughing so hard she almost slid off the bench onto the
floor. "What was that? Are we practicing for a porno movie or

"Sorry, I don't know what came over me." I used the spray to
sluice her clean.

"Well, I certainly know what came over me."

I finished my shower, dressed quickly, and went downstairs to the
kitchen, where I turned on the griddle over the stove and set a large
pot of coffee to brew. Then I whipped up a bowl of my famous pancake
batter - one of the few things I can cook well. I made a big stack of
pancakes and left them on edge of the stove to stay warm. Then I poured
two mugs of coffee and took them back upstairs.

"Do I smell coffee?" Cindy was standing in her walk-in closet,
wearing matching bra and panties in a silky tan material. I handed her
a mug and she took a grateful sip.

"So what are we doing today?" she asked. "What should I wear?"

"We're going shopping at the mall. And you can buy anything you

"Really? Oh goodie!"

"Wear something sexy. A short skirt would be great. Stockings,
not hose."

She gave me a wary, amused look. "Whatever you say, dear. Wait

A few minutes later she walked out of the closet wearing a black
miniskirt and a bright yellow silk blouse with tiny green frogs on it.
A wide belt with a gold buckle accentuated her narrow waist. Her black
sheer stockings had a discreet pattern of diamonds down the sides. It
sounds pretty flashy, but Cindy has a talent for making outfits like
this work.

"Yummy," I said.

"Is that for me?" She was looking nervously at the small, gaily-
wrapped package sitting on the bed.

"Happy birthday, sweetheart."

"Uh-hum. Thanks." She picked it up gingerly and gave it a
careful shake.

This is probably a good time to mention that Cindy and I have a
tradition of giving each other gag gifts on our birthdays. In the
beginning it was good clean fun, along the lines of ugly ties and
whoopie cushions, but recently the stakes have gotten higher. This year
my gag gift included a black leather gag, with matching wrist and ankle
cuffs. I spent most of my special day chained to a post in the
basement, polishing Cindy's extensive boot collection with my tongue.
I'll tell you all about it as soon as my therapist thinks I'm ready.

"Deej, you're not still mad about..."

"My birthday? Don't be silly, I had a blast."

She unwrapped her present and opened the box, peered inside with a
worried look. "I know I got a little carried away with the riding

"You already apologized for that, hon. Besides, you can't even
see where the welts were."

She finally reached in and took out a small black object, shaped a
little like a letter "J". The longer end had a pleasingly organic bulb
shape to it, and the shorter end was covered with little bumps.

"Oh dear," said Cindy. "It's a vibrator, isn't it?" She was
turning it in her hands, stroking the smooth plastic with her thumb in a
way that suggested she wasn't completely displeased.

"Yep. Don't be fooled by the small size - that's a state-of-the-
art pleasure device. It's designed to stay in place without you having
to hold onto it. Probably by a female gynecologist with too much time
on her hands."

Cindy has a childlike curiosity, especially for anything sexual,
and I wasn't surprised when she wriggled out of her panties and slipped
her new present inside her.

"How does it feel?"

"Fine - I can hardly tell its there." She looked confused. "But
how do you turn it on?"

I took the little remote out of my pocket. "With this."

"You mean it's remote controlled?" She laughed. "You've got to
be kidding me. Let me see - "

Suddenly her eyes grew wide and unfocused, and she got very weak
in the knees.

"Whoops!" I held onto her elbow to steady her. "Hey, did you
feel anything just now? Because I gave you a little -"

"DG! Let me see that."

I handed her the remote and she studied it with avid interest.
"That was amazing. It stimulates everything at once. So I guess you
just push this green ...Oh wow..."

I grabbed her before she could slump to the floor and switched it
off. I said "Maybe we need to dial it down a little."

I adjusted the intensity and buzzed her again. This time she just
got a dreamy smile on her face.

She leaned against me and purred. "Deej, honey, that's really

A few seconds later she said, in a woozy voice, "I get it
now...you pulled out early in the shower so my pussy would be nice and
clean for my present."


"I'm going to be wearing this at the mall, aren't I?"


"And you're going to have the remote."

"But of course."

She sighed. "I think I'm in big trouble."

"Don't be silly, we're going to have a blast."

She was quiet for a few seconds. Then I noticed that she had
slipped one hand under her skirt.

"Hey, that's not allowed!" I pulled her hand away. "Especially
when we're in public."

"Well, duh! Come on, turn it up a little, will you? I'm

I slid the intensity knob on the remote a little higher with my
thumb, and put my arm around Cindy to hold her steady.

She buried her face in my neck and said "Mmmmm....."

I felt her stiffen and suck in her breath as she came, and then I
switched her off.

"Thank you." Her face was flushed, and her eyes were sparkling
more brightly than usual. "Could you do me again?"

"Not yet - I think two orgasms before breakfast is plenty. Now
put your panties back on and come downstairs - I made pancakes."
The pancakes were delicious, as usual.

Cindy does most of her shopping at the Northbrook mall, but I
didn't want to go someplace where all the clerks knew her by name so we
drove out west to the huge Oak Brook mall. There were a few weeks left
before Christmas, twenty or so "shopping days" as the retail industry
calls them, but the parking lots were still full. Something to do with
the consumer confidence index, no doubt. I tried the parking garage,
and found a good spot in the corner of the top level.

Inside, the holiday decorations were up and the Christmas music
was working its insidious magic on the ears of all the consumers,
increasing their already-high confidence to new heights. We sauntered
along the main corridor, carried along by the flow of people.

"So where should we start?" asked Cindy.

"I need to stop at Radio Shack at some point for some speaker
wire. Other than that, I'm open to suggestions. It's your birthday,

"And I can buy whatever I want?" She slowed down in front of an
expensive jewelry store, and came to a stop in front of a display case
filled with enough gold jewelry to outfit an entire NBA team.

"Just remember what I've got here in my pocket."

I pressed a button on the little remote, giving her a short buzz
on medium power. She straightened up and let out a little squeak, then
looked around to see if anyone had noticed.

"Cut that out! You mean if I try to buy anything...?"

"The more expensive it is, the higher the power setting. Anything
with diamonds in it, you'll be rolling around on the carpet making
barnyard noises before you can get anywhere near the register."

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Well then, is
there anything here you might potentially approve of, Mr. Sade?"

"That's 'Marquis' to you. Actually I was thinking of a custom
pendant, like the rappers wear. 'Cindy' in inch-high gold letters."

"Not really me, I don't think. Any other ideas?"

"Hmm... how about an ankle bracelet?"

"Seriously? That might be cool."

"Sure, why not? Do something a little different. I'll tell you
what, if you can get a salesman to kneel down and put a bracelet around
your ankle, I'll let you buy it without any, shall we say... unnecessary

"You're on," she said with a giggle.

I followed Cindy into the store and watched from a discreet
distance as she arrowed in on a middle-aged salesman and immediately
garnered his full attention. I noticed that his eyes kept straying to
her legs. I couldn't really blame him, given how much of them was
exposed. Before long he had a whole row of gold bracelets laid out on
the glass counter for Cindy to inspect.

I moved closer to overhear what they were saying, pretending to be
absorbed by a display of complicated watches with multiple dials and

"...what you want to look for in an ankle bracelet, ma'am, is a
close fit, so it won't move around too much when you walk."

"Makes sense," agreed Cindy. She picked up one of the thicker
chains. "How about this one?"

"That's beautiful - would you like to try it on?"

"Yes, please," she said, giving the man a brilliant smile. She
put her right foot forward, hiking up her skirt just a tad, and said
"Would you mind? I'm afraid to kneel down in this outfit."

The man swallowed and glanced around apprehensively. Like he
really had a choice. He dropped to one knee and quickly fastened the
bracelet around Cindy's ankle. While he was down there, he looked very
much like a submissive paying fealty to his mistress, something that
wasn't lost on anyone else in the store.

Cindy strolled over to me and gave me a wink. "What do you think,
hon? Is it me?"

"It's gorgeous. But I hate to see you buy the first thing you try

"Good point. Stanley has given me a whole bunch to choose from."

Having done it once, Stanley could hardly refuse to do it again,
and Cindy had the poor guy put two more bracelets on her. He had some
trouble getting the last one unhooked, and when he finally stood back up
his face was bright red, either from embarrassment or high blood
pressure. I noticed that the other sales staff were watching with
considerable amusement.

"You know, I think I'll take the first one after all," said Cindy.

"Excellent. Will there be anything else?" Stanley asked.

"Not today, thanks," said Cindy.

"Didn't you mention something earlier about a toe ring?" I asked

Cindy stifled a laugh, and Stanley the salesman gave me a look I
won't describe as he led her to the register at the back of the store.
As Cindy was signing the receipt, she leaned forward and let her blouse
fall open, treating the salesman to an eyeful of her smooth, round
cleavage. The little tart.

I was chuckling to myself at this when a female voice spoke in my
ear. "They're really something, aren't they?"

"Excuse me?"

"They're beautiful as well as functional. The result of
generations of Swiss craftsmanship," continued the saleswoman earnestly.
She was in her sixties, with gray hair done up in a complicated bun.

By now I had figured out that she was talking about the watches.
I had forgotten I was still leaning on that display case. I resisted
the impulse to inform her that my wife was actually the result of
generations of French genetic research.

"Can I show one of them to you?" she asked.

"Perhaps... Do any of these measure wind speed?"

She bit her lip and shook her head in obvious disappointment. "I
don't think so, sir."

"Too bad. They are beautiful."

Outside in the mall, Cindy asked "Were we too mean to poor

"I don't think so. He did get a nice commission out if it, and
you gave him a peek down your blouse."

She laughed gaily. "You noticed that, did you?"

"And I approved, of course."

She threw her arms around me suddenly and gave me a long,
passionate kiss. Consumers were forced to step around us, and I started
to feel self-conscious.

She finally broke the kiss and said "DG? I'm really, really horny."

"I thought that might happen." I put my arm around her waist as
we started walking again, letting my hand slide down until it was
resting indecently low on the curve of her hip.

"But what am I going to do about it? You can't just turn that
thing on in the middle of a crowded mall. We'll get arrested."

"I've given it some thought, and I've got a few ideas."

"Goodie! I was hoping."

We spent the next few hours testing my ideas, and I'm happy to say
that some of them worked out quite well. I won't go into all the
details, but I will hit the highlights for you.

Dressing rooms were an obvious choice, and that's where we
started. Cindy would go in with some clothes to try on and then I would
activate the vibrator from outside. The problem was that I couldn't see
her, so I didn't know when to dial it up or down or when to turn it off.
We worked out some verbal signals, like "Honey, could you get me the
next size up," and "OK, that's enough shopping for now," but eventually
we decided there was no substitute for face-to-face feedback.

Naturally we became bolder and bolder with each successful
experience. For example, I can't really say it was a good idea for me
to buzz Cindy while she was trying out the massage chair at Hammacher
Schlemmer, but no one else in the store seemed to be the wiser.

One of my favorite moments came in the food court, sitting across
from each other at a little bistro table. Cindy asked me for a bite of
my danish, and I held it up to her mouth. As a joke, I gave her a
little buzz just as she bit into it.

"Mmmm," she said with a smile.

"That good?"

Our eyes met across the top of the Danish, and she nodded. I
slowly increased the power as we continued to stare at each other.
Cindy remained perfectly still with her jaw clenched, holding herself
under strict control, but I could see her pupils get wider and wider and
then contract suddenly as the orgasm hit.

She took a deep breath, glanced around self-consciously, and then
took another bite of my danish as if nothing had happened.

"Having fun?" I asked.

She nodded. "Let's go ride the elevator, shall we?"

The mall elevator is glassed in on three sides, and it was always
occupied as it trundled its way between the two levels. Cindy faced one
corner, looking out at the rows of stores stretching away into the
distance, and I stood right behind her with my groin pressed against her
firm little ass and the remote in my hand. We rode it up and down,
timing Cindy's orgasms for the hustle and bustle of people getting on
and off.

Pretty soon we had it down to a science. With the vibrator on the
lowest setting, Cindy would be slowly brought up to full arousal over a
period of a few minutes or so, until finally she would reach a plateau
where her eyes would be glazed, her breathing heavy, and her cheeks
flushed. At that point, when I dialed up the power her orgasm would be
nearly immediate. A few minutes of rest with the vibrator off, and we
would be ready to start over.

I have to admit, it's more power than any man should ever really
be entrusted with. I spent most of the day with my cock at about half-
mast or higher, and when Cindy was balancing at the edge waiting for me
to send her over I would grind my groin against her shamelessly,
pressing my swollen prick into the cleft of her ass. As you can
probably imagine, it wasn't long before I was just as horny as Cindy
was. Fortunately I had thought to wear loose, pleated slacks.

"My God, you're like the Energizer Bunny," I said, as the doors
closed again. "That was the sixth one since we got on this elevator."

"Someone sounds a little jealous," said Cindy perceptively.

I put my mouth close to her ear and murmured "I'm about ready to
come in my pants."

"So I gather. You should try it, it's fun."

"They don't make those little gizmos for men, unfortunately.
Believe me, I checked."

"I'm sure there are male proctologists working on it as we speak."

"Right. But in the meantime..." I pressed my stiff member
meaningfully against her rear.

She sighed and tilted her head back to talk into my ear. "I guess
you want to go back to the car so I can suck your cock until you explode
in my busy little mouth."

I swallowed hard. It drives me crazy when Cindy starts up with
the dirty talk.

"That would be lovely," I croaked. I glanced furtively around the
elevator, afraid that the waves of lust we were giving off were obvious
to all. When the door opened we stepped out into the mall and headed
for the parking garage.

As we approached the mall exit, I happened to spot a Radio Shack a
few stores farther down on the opposite side. You may well wonder how I
could possibly think of speaker wire at a time like this, and all I can
say is that I was in the process of installing a stereo system in my
study and I was anxious to try it out.

"Let me pop into Radio Shack," I said. "Just take a second."

"OK," said Cindy. "Don't dawdle." I got the impression she was
going to wait for me in the mall.

The store was filled with kids playing with the toys and
computers, and holiday music was blaring. Two boys were racing radio-
controlled cars up and down the congested aisles, and I had to hop over
one of them as I made my way to the back. The wall display was packed
with a million different kinds of wire and cables, and I stood there
scratching my head for a few minutes trying to sort it out. The rock-
and-roll version of "Rudolph the Red-Necked Reindeer" blaring in my ears
didn't help.

"Hey Mister..."

I suddenly realized that the little girl standing next to me was
talking to me.

"Mister, that lady over there is trying to get your attention. I
think she has to go to the bathroom or something."

I whirled around, and sure enough, Cindy was leaning against a
shelf with her legs crossed and a look of pained desperation on her

"Turn it off!" she mouthed.

I fumbled in my pocket for the remote and hit the off button.
Cindy straightened up and took a deep breath.

"What the hell?" I said, walking over to her.

"I came in to pick up some batteries," she said. "And all of a
sudden it went on full power." She stepped back as one of the race cars
came barreling down the aisle, electric motor whining. "I thought you
were doing it, but you weren't even - Yeeeech!"

She bent over and grabbed the shelf again, almost falling to the
floor. I mashed my finger down on the button again, and she stood up
again slowly.

"It's the radio-controlled cars!" I hissed. "They must be on the
same frequency."

"No shit!" she hissed. "Put that thing away will you?"

I realized I was holding the remote out at arm's length and
pointing it directly at Cindy's crotch. I quickly put it back in my

"Let's get out of here," I said. "I can buy the wire another
time," I added generously.

I took her arm and led her toward the front. Twice more before we
got out of the store, Cindy stiffened and sucked in her breath and I had
to switch her back off. I noticed that a few people were looking at us

"She'll be fine," I said. "Just a little too much stimulation
today, with all the crowds and excitement."

Finally we were back in the mall and out of range. As we walked
out to the parking garage, found our car, and got inside, Cindy
maintained an ominous silence.

I started the car, and then said "Sorry about that, hon."

She was staring straight ahead, and didn't answer for a few
seconds. Finally her mouth twitched, and she said "All part of life's
rich pageant, I suppose."

We looked at each other and started laughing. Then she reached
over and turned off the ignition.

"Still want that blow job?"

"Oh mama..."

I slid my seat all the way back and unzipped my pants. My cock
popped up into view, looking as eager and playful as a puppy just let
out into the back yard. Cindy put her hand around the base, pulling it
fully out into view, and then she leaned over and dropped her head into
my lap.

There are times when Cindy likes to take it slow, starting with
playful little nibbles and licks, letting my arousal slowly build as she
stimulates me with a wide variety of oral techniques. This wasn't one
of those times. My cock was immediately engulfed in her mouth, and I
could feel her tongue and throat working as she gathered as much saliva
as possible into her mouth. Then she started pistoning her mouth up and
down like a machine, her lips locked tightly around my shaft.

I leaned back and closed my eyes, nearly overcome by the intensity
of the pleasure. Hours of naughty exhibitionist foreplay in the mall
had left me in a state of supercharged arousal, and I progressed through
the normal stages of male sexual response like a video in fast-forward.
After a very few minutes, I could have sworn that the head of my cock
was swelling up like a balloon.

"Here it comes," I gasped. The warning was just in time. Hot
semen came shooting up out of my balls and into Cindy's mouth in
generous, milky spurts, each one seemingly bigger than the last. Cindy
sucked and swallowed like a trooper, no doubt unwilling to get any
stains on the leather upholstery of her Lexus. Finally she gave my
rapidly-deflating member one last, hard suck, leaving it clean, happy,
and just slightly damp.

"That," I said, zipping up my pants, "was lovely."

"All-in-all, it's been quite a day," she said. "I'll remember
this birthday for years."

I absentmindedly wiped a little dribble of semen off the corner of
her mouth with my finger. Something about her tone was making me

"So you're not mad about what happened in the Radio Shack?" I

"Water under the bridge, honey," she said with a reassuring smile.
"But just remember, it's only eight-one days until your birthday..."
The End, "Remote-Control Wife"
Copyright 1998 by DG (dionysian1@hotmail.com)

Author's notes:

1) This is the fourth DG/Cindy story. More will follow,
because I enjoy writing them!
2) You can find all my stories on my web page:
3) Please email me at dionysian1@hotmail.com if you have any
comments on this story. I reply to all emails.

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