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The Downward Spiral choosing a queen


It's amazing the speed at which an idea you don't even know you have can
turn into a plan you don't realize you have made. I had gone to her house,
knowing what would happen. The new idea had formed independently in my
head. I wanted to fuck Kathleen in the ass. I wanted a toy. The thought
hit me just like that. I know it seems self-absorbed and more than a
little unhinged. Normally guys that thought of other human beings end up
with all three of their names being announced on the news while they cover
their heads. You know the headlines, "Serial Killer Caught" and all that.
It's a classic case of a psychopath to not see people as being as real as
they are. That's one of the reasons guys like Ted Bundy and Jeffery
Dhalmer can be as brutal as they were. I wasn't thinking of anything
brutal or even painful. As I drove home, the idea I had been gestating in
the back of my mind suddenly slipped forward.

It would be easy, well, relatively easy.

The idea was simple. I had to find another job, out of Texas. It had
to be out of Texas because I had a fairly large and close extended family.
There is a strong resemblance with my brother, my sister, and myself all
look fairly similar. Maybe Virginia, that seemed far enough away to allow
me to live this out and see what happened. Virginia would work well, it
was far removed from anyone that knew my family and Kate lived there. She
would be my start. I had already started to alter some of her behavior and
the question was how much more I could. I felt that because I was not too
far removed from my sense of humanity; that I would be able to alter it
further to suit my needs. I wasn't thinking about making her walk naked on
the street. No what I was thinking of was far better than that. I would
take a job and in my time and start a stable of Girls. A perversion of the
standard family. Kate would be my first, and I think I did feel some
degree of anger for her, but that really was yet to take hold. The odd
thing was I actually thought of it as a perversion, yet it did not hold the
revulsion or distaste for me that most people have when they think of the
word. I embraced the idea.

Kathleen called me that night. We chatted about this and that. She
worked for a company that helped small mom and pop stores go out of
business. This afforded her a good deal of travel without many questions
from her husband, whom did not seem too terribly interested regardless.
She was hungry for my attentions and even more so for my cock. As I always
had a tendency to do, I began to turn the conversation sexual. I was
already naked and asked her to do as much. As we moved into phone sex, I
began to talk. I rarely masturbated during phone sex and even during real
sex had a propensity for vocalizing. As she panted and moaned into the
phone I started laying my plan into action, but oddly I had no script or
clearly laid out plan, it was all instinct and happening pretty much
without too much effort.

"I love the feel of your legs around me." I said. "The feel of your
pussy." She moaned. "When you came down last time in that skirt and those
stockings I wanted to fuck you right there in the terminal in front of

She gasped and called out, "Oh my sweet love!"

"I wanted to rub your pussy in the car." Another gasp and a moan, she
was getting close. "If you didn't wear panties I could fuck you and touch
you anytime I wanted." She cried out, her breath and voice caught in the
ecstasy and I grunted and groaned with her, simulating the sound of my own
orgasm. Then I waited for her breathing to calm, I had to press my luck
now. I could not allow her to fully come from the plateau she was
currently on. As soon as she was nearly purring in my ear, I pressed the
point. "I don't want you to wear panties anymore."

"What about my period?" She had received a barium enema for some reason
in childhood, but the doctor had been all but a criminal putting the enema
in the wrong orifice thusly putting a whole in her uterus. Still, she had
her monthly courses but assured me there was no need for a condom.

"You already use Tampons. You don't have to have anything to attach
them to." She made a brief sound of argument but did not agree or disagree.
"The thought of knowing you are bare assed under your skirt..." It was my
turn to make a sound, an honest one, of hungered lust. "If you feel you
have to have some pairs of panties, you should by thongs or g-strings only,
oh my god, seeing you in a thong." I made the noise again as the thought
had literally just occurred to me.

"I may have woken Ted." She answered. "I should go."

"Think about what I said Kate, I'll see you in two weeks."

"I love you." She whispered almost silently. I smiled and hung up as if
I had been making the motion before she made her declaration. Somehow her
saying she loved me made it easier for me to go through this. We had
agreed early on that this was not about love and here she was changing it.
Yes, she would do nicely.

I was smiling up at my ceiling when my phone rang.


"Hey Ian." It was Julie. I had worked with Julie at Kroger. She was a
sweet girl with a nice body, great eyes and a smile I loved to see.
Unfortunately she picked a bad time to call. She had broken up with her
boyfriend several of months before and after a serious car crash that had
removed the pinky from her right hand. She was a nurse now and had odd
hours but we had become fairly close friends over the last couple of
months. She had wanted someone she felt comfortable with to do stuff with,
and had picked me. She had assured me she wasn't looking for love and I
had set that as a boundary in my mind. The last few times we had gone to
the movies our casual flirting had become more intense leading up to the
space of the three weeks I had not heard from her. I was feeling lustful
now and wanted to call up the night she had felt a change in our

We had gone out for burgers and a movie and arrived back at my parents'
house. Over the last few weeks, our conversation frequently turned to talk
of sex while we drove. This night, I laid down a challenge to her. So now
we sat on the comfortable sofa and talked about the challenge.

"So really do think you kiss that well?" She asked me.

"It's not really a matter of think, Jules." I really did think of her as
a jewel, so that's what I called her. "It's always happened that way. I
mean when other guys were talking to guy about how to kiss I was making
friends with the girls, I figured they were a better source of

"So how do you do it?" She leaned on the beige sofa, one hand on her

"You want me to tell you?" She nodded. "It's not that easy. There no
set patterns or sequences of events that makes a perfect kiss. It's
attitude and paying attention to the person you are kissing."

"Well, that makes it easy to not be able to dispute." She grinned. "You
mean I just have to take your word for it."

"I could show you but you are prepared so it might not take your breath
away as much." I shrugged. "But I also don't want to jeopardize losing my

"We'll be friends no matter what, ok?" She put her hand out for me to
shake and I took in mine and held it there. "But have to be able to prove

"Agreed." I still had her hand, in a handshake grasp in mine. It wasn't
hard for me to look at her with hunger. I had been attracted to her before
she and Charles broke up. She had soft, though small, and inviting lips
and blue eyes that were soft like the spring sky after a good rain. I
slowly rubbed my thumb on the back of her hand. I looked into her eyes for
three minutes at least and I saw her swallow. She was feeling it.

"When do you start?" She tried to mask the husky tones in her voice but
I heard them. I moved my left hand to cup her right cheek and slowly
leaned towards her.

"Who says I haven't?" My voice was equally thick with lust just before I
brushed her lips with my own. I kissed her softly and gently until I felt
them part. My key to a great kiss is in restraint. You have to be aware
of the subtle hints of readiness your partner will give you. I mean a
woman's neck is a highly erogenous area and should always by high on a
man's hit list, but you can't go stampeding for "the goodies." If you do
that you break the magic and kill the moment. So my rule I use my tongue
when I feel the tips of hers. I don't go grabbing breasts until she is
obviously feeling my up, and even then I wait, keeping my hands on her face
and neck. Kissing her lips, cheeks, eyes, and neck, always only stepping
up or responding to her own natural reactions. Some people might say I'm
dispassionate, but I doubted Julie felt that way. It's not that I didn't
want to just shove my hands under her blouse and my tongue down her throat,
but there was a time for that. I had to hold off until it was what she
wanted, that was never too long from when we started so waiting was not a
problem. I kissed the soft and tasty flesh of her neck, moaning as she
pressed against me. She wanted me to touch her somewhere else. Instead I
pulled her over onto my lap, straddling me. She was wearing jeans and so
was I, but I knew she could feel my rock hard prick and she pulled my mouth
to hers and her tongue invaded my mouth. I started untucking her blouse. I
fumbled a bit on the buttons of the garment but it didn't take long for it
to fall open, I slid my hands up her smooth soft belly. Only the scars
from her emergency surgery marred her chest and stomach and I didn't mind
them in the least. My hands slid over the satiny feeling material of her
bra. The curves of her breasts were soft and warm and I wanted to suckle
on her nipples, my thumb slid into the valley between the twin globes of
flesh and discovered she had a front hooking bra. I thanked God for small
favors, and undid the clasp. My hands moved down and then back up over her
great breasts. I, like most men, did enjoy gargantuan breasts but Julie's
didn't fall in that category. Yet, in my mind they were perfect. They fit
in my hands and were firm and soft and smooth. I was sucking her erect
nipple before she spoke to me again.

"If we don't stop now," her voice was husky with arousal and what I
thought was heavy regret at what she was saying, "your parents are going to
find us in a bad situation." She was right. I helped her get herself
covered and walked her to her car and we shared a very brief kiss

Since then she had avoided calling me. I had been sidetracked from
calling her and should have felt bad but... now she was calling me. A
part of wishes she had called me in the morning and the two of us might
have lived a nice quiet "normal" life, as I do love her greatly. Yet she
had not waited, and now my run away mind had made another decision.

Julie was going to be my queen.


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